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I'm so confused and I can't think straight

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by XxSunXDragonxX, Aug 8, 2015.

  1. XxSunXDragonxX

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    Okay, so I'm pretty sure I'm genderfluid at this point in time. My gender identity by itself isn't a problem...yet.

    Right now I'm having a problems with being called a she or a he. I've looked up gender-neutral pronouns, but I don't like them either. I was thinking about just being called by my name instead, but I don't know if I like my name.

    I'm also having trouble when my mom compliments me. She called me a pretty princess queen this morning and I was like, "Nooo..." and she got mad at me for that. Sometimes she says I'm handsome and I get uncomfortable just as much as the latter. I feel bad for this because I know I'm being hard on her. :icon_sad:

    At this point in time I really don't understand myself, and I wish I could think clearly and know how to go about my life without feeling awkward all the time. :bang:

    This just really sucks and I feel like I'm stuck in a tar pit. It seemed more simple in the beginning, but now I'm really confused.

    Any help would be greatly appreciated. I don't have anyone else to talk to about this and I feel really alone.
    :icon_sad:
     
    #1 XxSunXDragonxX, Aug 8, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2015
  2. Gamer4now

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    I don't really have any experience in this department other than put yourself in situations where you question what you want to be called. Or experiment with friends having them call you a different name or pronoun. I don't really know what to say sorry
     
  3. XxSunXDragonxX

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    I don't have any friends to experiment with. :icon_sad:
     
  4. Gamer4now

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    Neither do I just wanted to help. Sorry
     
  5. XxSunXDragonxX

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    It's okay.
     
  6. randomconnorcon

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    I don't know how to say this without sounding bad because you said you feel bad about it, but try not to. It's okay to not like certain pronouns or being called certain things. My dad calls me and my five year old sister his princesses, too, and the first thing I do is pull a face and say no. Parents may not especially like it and they may not stop, but they can't force you to like it and you can tell them no. My dad is slowly accepting that I do not like any "girl" things. Parents may do that, too.

    As for what you want to be referred to... You don't really need a friend to experiment with. I didn't tell any of my friends about my gender or my pronouns until I was sure. Moving from he to she and vice versa isn't always easy, no matter how sure you are about your gender. It can be really uncomfortable for some people at first because you're not used to hearing it out loud. Maybe experiment with them (he, she, they and any others you might want to try); use them in front of a mirror or when you're getting dressed. It'll be strange to refer to yourself in the third person, but it might help make you more comfortable in the long run.

    But if you don't want to or you try and none still work, then just being referred to by your name is just as good. It took me a few times to find my name, so don't be upset if the one you have or any you come across end up not being right for you. You just gotta try them out, like with the pronouns. And maybe along the journey, you'll find a friend who you can talk to, whether it be in real life or a place like here.

    I hope this helps and if you ever need to talk or try out names/pronouns, I'm always here. :slight_smile:
     
  7. XxSunXDragonxX

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    Omg. Thank you so much. That's the best advice ever! (!) I'll be sure to drop a message on your wall if I have any other questions. ^__^
     
    #7 XxSunXDragonxX, Aug 9, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 9, 2015
  8. FootballFan101

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    The empty closet community is your friend

    ---------- Post added 9th Aug 2015 at 09:38 PM ----------

    Same with you were your friend (!)