When I was first questioning my gender I began looking at terms, I first came across the term gender fluid (that another forum site suggested), but after a few months of "not feeling feminine" or fluctuating from male to female to neutral, I began using the term trans and it fit. I was so relieved to have finally found a term to define myself. The past couple months now, about once a month, my dysphoria subsides and I start to question whether or not I am actually trans or making my life a hell of a lot more complicated for myself. I have been wearing my binder everyday for the last few weeks, now that I have one I actually like, so I don't know if my dysphoria is subsiding since it feels like they're "not really there". I know dysphoria comes and goes, but I find that's when I start questioning myself the most. Am I really trans? Am I making my life more complicated? All these questions run through my head. I don't have a therapist or anything, and I haven't told my parents or friends how I'm feeling. I'm just really confused. :bang:
My dysphoria comes and goes too now that I've been in transition medically. I rarely have moments now where my physical dysphoria gets debilitating and social dysphoria only gets to me now and then. This is compared to how I was a year or two ago when it made me practically suicidal all the time. Some people are like that; being beaten down by their dysphoria on a regular basis, having it come and go, be in low energy states constantly, or only experience blips of it. It doesn't make someone more or less trans. Are you able to see a gender therapist, or at least reach out to a local support group? They might be able to help you sort your feelings out if you're questioning or feeling confused.
I probably won't be able to see a therapist or support group for a few months, or until I move to the city (unless it's online). Finding a therapist has been on my mind for a while now, but 1) I don't know who's good? 2) kind of nervous/scared 3) I'd like my parents to know before I start, so at least they know what's kind of going on as well. I did find a bunch of resources online from "The Pride Center" from the closest city to me, which is kind of cool.
I think society/your environment is what is making your life more complicated, not you. [earlier in your same post] Seems like you just need validation of how you are feeling, and to have love, support, and encouragement. Know that we are all here for you.
