(I posted this in the wrong forum by accident before, so I'm reposting here, where it was meant to go) I have been struggling with expressing my gender, both to myself and my allies(Family/friends) I recently asked my mom if I could get a binder for use on my more masculine days. She was very put down by the idea. My mom is generally very accepting, and has stood with me for as long as I've been out to her. I was primarily quite confused as to why she would outright refuse my request. Did she not understand what genderfluid meant? Did she not grasp the concept that she had in fact, lost her daughter? When I asked her, this was her argument. "You shouldn't care about what other people think of how you look/act. You shouldn't care about how you look/act. Guys can have breasts too. You should just be the best "you" that you can be. You be you." Are you seeing the irony yet? I can't be "me", if I'm a girl, but if I express myself as masculine, then I'm not being "me", in my original, or current state. At the same time, I'll always be "me," because I'm, well... Me. I love paradoxes, but this is just confusing, can someone explain what I should do?
That makes me think think of my mom saying "you will always be my daughter" even though she also says that she will accept me for who I am. I would try to save for a binder, or ask another family member/friend for one.
If she wont help you buy one, there also things like binder exchanges and the like to keep in mind: TransGuys - Where to Get Free or Reduced Price Chest Binders Binder Giveaways | Free Donated Chest Binder | Point 5cc Perhaps express to your mother that you would be doing this for you, not what others thought of you. So you could be comfortable and happy.