Well anyone who's out about being trans to their parents probably knows the guilt when your parents cry about loosing their daughter/son. Though technically I am genderfluid, I have to face the fact that, later in life, there's a chance I'll completely transition. i still want to be my parent's child, and I'm even okay with them calling me their daughter. But sometimes, I am also their son, and want that to be recognized. I'm lenient with pronouns, and understand that they are hesitant to agree to boys clothes, binders, different names, etc. I dress like a boy anyways, have since I was like... Some young age. That one they're cool with, for the most part. But the rest of it they're not used to. It's hard to have your mom cry on your shoulder, because she misses her daughter. I don't know what to do.
This is something I've thought fretted about a lot, and I know it must be hard for you. I mean, my parents already have SIX sons... only two daughters (in their eyes). As the elder "female" I feel like I'm supposed to be setting an example to my little sis, and at the same time I feel like I'm also supposed to be a big brother - which is who I really am. I'm torn. When I transition I know it will break my parent's hearts, at least at first. But this isn't your fault. You didn't choose to be genderfluid any more than they chose to be male and female. You can't put that burden on yourself, as tempting as that may be. I'm sure you are both a wonderful daughter and son to your parents, and hopefully they can come to see that too one day. Best wishes to you. If you ever need anyone to talk to - while I'm not in your exact situation - I'd be more than willing to help. Cheers. -Alec-
