Hello, Although I'll never be able to understand for myself any gender other than agender, If I ask other people about their gender then I can understand how it feels for them. Please could you tell me if you have some spare time. Gender: How does it feel? Thank-you.
Considering myself a woman just feels right. Calling myself a woman just feels right. Being understood to be a woman just feels right. So, so right. It feels wrong to think of myself not being a woman, or being anything in addition to a woman. Before starting my transition, it felt wrong calling myself male. It felt weird when people thought I was male. Now that I started transitioning it hurts a lot when people gender me wrong.
I think it's a little different for everyone. Gender itself I don't think has a feeling but the things that are attached to it do. Dysphoria is a feeling, passing has a feeling, being mis-gendered has a feeling and so fourth. It's a like a big mixture of many things.
Being that I an agender (mostly) myself I've often had a hard time understanding what a gender feels like as well. But then I have days where every waking thought is plagued by "I have to be a man. I am a man". Its a feeling that this body is not female in any sense even though I have breast and periods. I don't understand how these thingd alone make a women. I feel like when I look in the mirror I should see sharpness and intenseness, because that is what I associate with being a guy. But in the mirror my reflection seems soft, round, and dulled. Its kind of like the real me is blurred a bit by the world around me. I was assigned female at birth I have the overwhelming feeling that I should of been physically male. But when it comes to how I wish people to view me in a social setting...That is when it gets harder to explain. I do not wish to be seen as female but I do not wish to be seen as male either. I simply wish to be seen me, because I am a person before I am anything else.
I feel like an undefined gender. Not really a woman, not really a man. Though, agender doesn't fit either. I just go with genderqueer or gender neutral.
Gender itself doesn't really feel like anything. I'm a guy because I'd be more comfortable with a male body, and I want to be seen by others as a guy.
gosh, I'm new to the agender concept. but I've always felt my skin crawl to think my self as my designated gender. I've only recently thought I might be a trans, but being the opposite gender feels a bit off too. now I'm unsure whether, phisical traits aside, differentiating between female and male is sexist or not. physically, though, I feel I would be better off with out any traits showing I'm male or female. it's all just confusing..
It's very hard to pinpoint or describe exactly how gender feels like. It certainly is a feeling, in a way, just a difficult one to articulate. But you can sort of see it through the cracks, so to speak, in different ways...wanting to be treated and seen as a certain gender by others, that desire comes from the feeling of being a certain gender internally. Wanting a body to allign with an intrinsic internal feeling- and that feeling is gender, I would presume. In some ways, feeling a strong connection with the idea of being and living as a certain gender.
I don't know if I could tell you. People talk a lot about feeling like some gender or another, and I struggle to wrap my head around it because it's rare that I 'feel like' a gender in particular. I guess for me, it involves how I recognise myself. I don't tend to attach a gender to the person that I see in the mirror, but sometimes I do and that feels kind of weird in and of itself, whether the gender is male, or female, or strictly agender. I don't feel like I shouldn't have the body I do (and I don't even dislike it - it's lovely and there are so many parts of it I wouldn't change for the world), but at the same time, I feel like if I woke up with a flat chest I'd be relieved. My feelings about how other people refer to me are complicated, because I don't know how to untangle how I feel about being referred to in a female-gendered way from how I feel about the connotations of the words used to refer to me. Is it being female I'm uncomfortable with, or is it the expectations and assumptions associated with being female? Who knows. I try to leave that part out of the picture! I guess if I could live as...me, with neutral pronouns and a neutral name that I actually liked without having to go through the arduous process of coming out repeatedly, I would. If I could have the body I liked without the time and many many drawbacks that surgery would involve, I would. I guess to me that's probably what speaks the most about what my gender (whatever it is) is.
