So. Last night I tried to talk to my dad about college, and he flipped out and got emotional saying "Why do you want to go to that school? My friend looked it up and said it was hard academically. Why can't you go to school 20 minutes away? Why do you want a job that won't pay you? Why can't you be like me and give up your dreams and survive? Why do you want to learn film so bad? It's a horrible job! You can't get decent work there, and if you do it'll be miserable! Just go to community college and survive! Put food on the table!" and wouldn't listen to me. Bottom line is, he doesn't want me to go to school for what I want and where I want. Plus, here's where my sister kicks in, my sister wants to apply for the same school. If she does, she'll cause problems for me with transition, won't use my name and pronouns, and could out me. She could also invite my parents to come visit, and that'll be the end of me. What do I do with both these problems? Like my dad doesn't want me to go to school for film and get a job connected to film, and my sister would be a roadblock in my transition. And if my parents came to visit, and saw the way I would be dressed, they would have a massive spastic attack where they could hurt me or others. Advice? :/ <3
Hello, Apply for the school anyway and once you're accepted then just don't look back. If your sister does get into the same school, then perhaps be open about your gender and tell people in the 'getting to know' week so that people can call you by your preferred pronouns and name and not what your sister says. You could put on GLEE song ''Loser like me'', even though it sounds like a negative song, it's actually full of future positivity.
I have a bit of the same problem with college. I was going to go for engineering and take acting on the side, but in the process, I decided I really love technical theater. My dad is super mad at me because "You're too smart to go into the arts, you need to stick with engineering so you can get a real job and not end up on the streets." I'm sticking with technical theater, I'm not going to give up what I enjoy just because someone else tells me what to do. I say major in whatever makes you happy. I'm not sure what to say about your sister. My dad isn't very supportive (he thinks trans people and gays are "disgusting") but my mom is and I'm 1100 miles from them right now, so family hasn't been an issue. (I do have a brother, but he doesn't know and I never see him). Would you be taking the same classes as your sister? If not, depending on the size of the school it may not be as big of an issue. Have you tried talking to her about it? Sorry if thats not much help. Hang in there.(*hug*)
Okay. Thanks for the advice! ^-^ <3 ---------- Post added 12th Nov 2015 at 07:50 PM ---------- Thanks for the encouragement! And my sister is older than me and would be sophomore when I'm a freshman. Plus she would take digital photography and I would take digital film making. It may not be a big issue, but I just see my sister as being a roadblock. I should talk to her about it...but probably not tonight. Thanks. *hug* ^-^ <3
You sister going to the same school seems like it would definitely be a problem, but since you say she's interested in applying, it doesn't sound like she's definitely going yet. Don't worry about it too much until you know for sure. If she doesn't end up going, then there isn't even a problem to worry about. As for your father, ignore him. Apply to the school you like. Study what makes you happy. It's not his job to tell you what to do with your life.
