I was born with female parts, but I'm getting confused about my own body. When I turned fifteen, I realized I didn't care who I went out with. Coming out as pansexual was hard, but my family was thankfully accepting. I have a genderqueer friend, and when I told my family about them, with permission of course, they had a negative reaction. "So she wants to be a man, but keep her tits and date boys?" "No mom, they don't want breasts. They want to gave people call them by gender neutral terms." "So she wants to be a boy, but doesn't want a penis?" "No, dad. They would rather be called by masculine pronouns if you don't want to call them "them". As you can probably tell, I can't discuss this with my family. I don't know what to do. I want to be a boy. I want to be a girl. I mostly am leaning towards my male identity these days. When I'm a boy, I call myself Beckett, or Beck for short. I know I'm rambling, I just don't know what to do. I don't know how to cope with myself right now. I don't even know what I feel is called. Please help me if you can.
I think it may be genderfluid, but even though I have boy and girl days, I can't tell my parents ever