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Trans feelings fading?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by AndySammy, Dec 6, 2015.

  1. AndySammy

    AndySammy Guest

    Now I've known I'm trans for about a year. I've come out to my parents, to my friends.
    And then the trans feelings, not disappeared, but faded.
    After I discovered Melanie Martinez I want to be exactly like her. I want to use makeup. Wear female clothing.
    Basically be female. I've never wanted that before. I haven't felt trans all my life, but I haven't felt female either. Then two years ago, I started feeling very trans, having bad dysphoria, I cut my hair, I changed style, everything. I felt comfortable for the first time in my life. Now I want long hair, female clothing, makeup. I've never had this need before in my life.
    I don't want to rush anything, cause there's the possibility that this is just a crush on her aesthetic. I don't know.
    Am I non-binary? Genderfluid? Or... Cis?
    I know you can't tell me what I am, but just guide me in the right direction.
     
  2. BradThePug

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    It also could be that you are becoming more comfortable with your transgender identity. I know that as I became more comfortable with my identity, I started being a more feminine guy. I had some moments where I thought that I was not trans because I was confused by these feeling.

    I would take your time and see if these feelings change or remain the same.
     
  3. thepandaboss

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    Pretty much. Happened to an extent with me too. I'm still interested in some of the same things I was pre-transition like cooking. Not that cooking's feminine. The big thing to ask yourself is whether you still want to legally and personally be known as a man. If so, you're a transman. If not, explore those feelings.
     
  4. Kasey

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    I still like chugging beer and bro-ing out. And gross violence and what not.

    But I like cute dresses and pretty makeup and looking beautiful.
     
  5. oliverouge

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    I have felt this alot lately too tbh. i mean it all just depends on what you want to label yourself. but just remember that gender identity can be defined by whatever you want it to not what people say it is. and also remember there is nothing wrong with changing your mind if you learn you arent trans later
     
  6. darkcomesoon

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    That's not what being female is, though. A man who likes makeup isn't automatically a woman any more than a woman who hates dresses is automatically a man. I can understand why a change in how you want to present can be confusing, but it doesn't necessarily mean anything about your gender.

    When I first started IDing as non-cis, I decided to never wear a dress again. I was socially dysphoric, so I didn't want to be read as female, and I was physically dysphoric, so I didn't want to wear clothes that would emphasize my chest and hips. A dress would make me dysphoric for both of those reasons, so I decided I hated wearing them. As I've grown more comfortable with my gender, I've found that I actually feel really nice in dresses, at least on days where I can squash the dysphoria. If I get to go on T, I'm going to love wearing dresses. I'll be able to wear them without feeling dysphoric. The fact that my desired gender expression changed as I got more comfortable with being a guy didn't mean that my gender had changed. I just decided I liked different clothing.

    Are you still dysphoric? Are you still comfortable being referred to and seen as a guy? If so, I wouldn't worry about this change. You can just be a guy who likes makeup and women's clothing. So take some time to think about it. Explore whether this is really a change in gender or just a change in gender expression. And don't worry too much about it. It'll sort itself out.
     
  7. AndySammy

    AndySammy Guest

    Thanks to all of you. I'll see if this lasts, and then... I don't know, though. I'll see if it's a lasting 'problem'.