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Finding out what feels comfortable

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by NotKnowing, Dec 9, 2015.

  1. NotKnowing

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Germany
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Last week I cut my own hair and now I feel a bit more comfortable since I look a little more boyish. It's still quite long though, so today I'm going to go to a hairdresser and get it cut really short.
    I think this will help me figure out if being male/ being considered male is something I want... At least I hope it will.

    Do any of you have any ideas what else I could try out without having to actually tell people? I know that it's recommended to use different pronouns, but that would include having to tell someone and I'm not ready for that yet.

    Thanks for any responses, have a nice day :slight_smile:
     
  2. denouement

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Riften
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Before I came out to my mom I switched to wearing clothing from the guy's section. This was in high school; I just started complaining about feminine clothes (which isn't new, Ive been complaining since I was a kid lol), then started complimenting t-shirts from the guy's section, and slowly migrated over there until she was somewhat used to me getting clothes from there. She thought it was weird, but tolerated it.

    Then I cut my hair short, and asked my dorm RAs to call me by a fairly unisex nickname (in your case this could be a friend or maybe even teachers). I also bought a binder, but this may be more difficult for you as I was able to ship it to my dorm instead of my house.
     
  3. NotKnowing

    Regular Member

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    So I just cut my hair and it feels absolutely awesome I'm so happy I've done it. I think I will tell some friends tomorrow (they already joke about me being trans, so they kinda suspect it, but don't believe it) and I don't think my mum will take it too bad... I hope so at least. She probably won't believe me, but I want to ask her if I can go to a therapist so they can like confirm it...
    But right now I'm quite hopeful :slight_smile:
     
  4. darkcomesoon

    Full Member

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    Location:
    New Jersey
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Good luck with telling your friends! It doesn't sound like they'll be particularly surprised, so I bet it'll go great.

    If you can get a binder, that can give you a sense of whether you feel comfortable having a flat chest. Also, clothes from the men's/boy's department can help to hide curves (if they fit okay), which can help you figure out whether you'd feel better having a generally more masculine body.
     
  5. DemiLiHue

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Chile
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Good luck. But remember to come out only when u feel comfortable with it, an sure of your gender.