Hi everyone. I was wondering if anyone out there that has transitioned MTF could help me. There is a trans woman that works in a store I frequent. She is very passable but my trans/gaydar was in fine tune. I know she is obviously a trans woman but I don't want to offend her by talking to her about it. Did I make her feel bad by "clocking" her. I know she knows I know that she is trans. I just a have a trans woman in my back yard so to speak and want to chat with her but don't know how. Help> Love Love Love all over everyone here.
Really, the best thing you can do is to just treat her like any woman. And maybe tell her that she's beautiful and you'll probably brighten up her whole day.
I haven't begun my transition yet, but I don't think that really matters. You asked how to talk to her? Well, my advice is stop viewing her as a trans woman and just view her as a person (I don't mean that you're being transphobic or anything, I just mean stop focusing on her transness). Just talk to her. If transgenderism or something comes up in conversation, well, just be respectful and all, of course.
Call her by her name. Use pronouns she and that's it. Does someone come up to you and ask "oh you're that gay guy right?". No, you're just some other dude. You aren't defined by being gay that's just one of your attributes. Same for trans people.
Hey thanks to all for responding. Please understand I do not mean to offend. I am asking how not to offend her. I am truly interested in her and how transitioning has impacted her life. love love everyone.
Personally, I wasn't offended. I just said what I'd personally like, and in most cases, it really is that simple.
