Just wanted to ask (mostly to the genderqueer people) how did you chose and how did u feel ur gender? Because im kinda confused, I dont know if I have a gender or not! I dont know what label to choose for myself… basically because I dont know how a gender feels:help:
Well, how about you begin by explaining as best as you can how you feel and think when you think "my gender" to yourself? <3
Well, I think… I totally cant relate to any binary gender, at least… M-my gender… is (I dont even know if I do have a gender) feels like I can strech it to make it bigger, but it feels... Empty?? How's a gender supposed to feel like?? I feel it is far away from the binary. Far, far away:eusa_doh:
I'm one of those people who ended up just...not choosing a label, haha. There are so many labels now that trying to find the 'right' one ended up being more stressful than it needed to be, so my choice was to not bother! I'm happy for other people to call me genderqueer or non-binary if it helps them to have a word, but I get by without one. As for how my gender 'feels'...I struggle to say. It's the sum of its parts: neutral pronouns make me feel calm, I feel like seeing myself as female is something I can do if I (metaphorically) squint but it doesn't come naturally a lot of the time. Being called heavily gendered terms or having attention drawn to the fact other people see me as female can feel weird and 'off'. Sometimes I wish I had a flat chest, sometimes I don't. My advice is to work with feelings first, labels later (if you're struggling to find a label). Follow the things that make you feel good and right about yourself. And don't worry if a label feels good to you but isn't 'perfect'. And of course, sometimes broad labels like non-binary are good because of how much they can encompass! It's really down to what works for you when it comes to picking a term to refer to yourself with.
I go with 'genderqueer' (or 'non-binary') just so it has a label. I find it more comfortable to know there's other people experiencing about the same like me, and by having a term for it I feel like I belong to a group. When I express myself I usually say 'I'm genderqueer (or genderneutral) which means to me that I don't feel like a woman but don't want to be a man either'. This is a short explaination that allows people to ask questions but at the same time makes clear how I feel. I don't know if this makes sense though, I'm still figuring myself out.
Thanks for the advice! I think that for now im going for genderqueer enby ---------- Post added 12th Dec 2015 at 11:54 AM ---------- I agree. So ur kind of neutrois?
I went through a ton of different labels, but I think, for me, having more of a broader term for my gender is better than being confined to a limiting term. Also, like OddSocks said, finding the "correct" label for myself was far too stressful. As for realizing my gender, I never felt fully female, but I also never felt fully male. I wouldn't want to transition because I am happy with my body as is, though I do get dysphoria once and a while, but it's not bad enough for me to physically transition.
