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Mom doesn't let me Bind

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by DemiLiHue, Jan 2, 2016.

  1. DemiLiHue

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    Can binding using sport bras bring breast health issues for a 13 y. o.? Cause I'm out to mom and now she doesn't let me bind because she says my breasts are growing and etc. and I just would love to bind but I can't help please
     
  2. Kodo

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    I understand, and unfortunately yes she is correct. Binding at any age eventually breaks down breast tissue - but particularly during puberty. However, wearing regular sports bra all the time should be okay, as long as you aren't causing yourself pain.

    Here would be a time when I think you should consider (a) the pain of not binding as opposed to (b) displeasing your mother by continuing to bind. You could continue to bind, and not tell her. Or you could just do it at peak dysphoria, when you really need relief. If you aren't constantly binding then the physical effects are next-to-none.

    But if you need to do so more often, perhaps you could try explaining to her why you need to bind? That, the fact of the matter is you don't want breasts to develop or be there so that's why you bind in the first place. Maybe you could even ask her to see the doctor about getting you on hormone blockers - though this largely depends on how supportive she is. Or you could ask her to help you get a real binder, which has been shown to safely and effectively bind.
     
  3. DreamerBoy17

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    I didn't think that sports bras could seriously break down breast tissue, but I might be wrong on this. I use an actual binder, but my tumors could decompose on my chest for all I care. For me, binding is a huge deal. My dysphoria and mental health improved immensely after binding. It was worth any health risk in my case.

    So, I think you should ask yourself if it is worth that risk (and your mom's displeasure) by binding. As Kodo suggested, maybe you could only bind during your worst bouts of dysphoria? Or, if your dysphoria is really bad, maybe you could have a conversation with your mom about how much your mental health could improve if you could bind.
     
  4. baconpox

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    Wearing a sports bra doesn't wear down breast tissue like regular binding does, unless you layer them or something.
     
  5. DemiLiHue

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    These are really good ideas but my mom, i talked to her, but she also says I need to have more self esteem and stuff...is this true??
     
  6. Nobo

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    Id have to agree with your mom here unless you want to go completely trams no going back then go for it
     
  7. DemiLiHue

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    I layer two, with one folded. Would that be enough to be harmful? What means breaking breast tissue...? Like bleeding, or having saggy boob, or what...?
     
  8. DreamerBoy17

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    Completely trans?

    I think you need to talk to your mom and have a long talk about your gender identity, and you want to suppress your breasts because of dysphoria, not because you have low self-esteem.

    ---------- Post added 3rd Jan 2016 at 09:02 PM ----------

    I did the layering thing for about 6 months almost daily. I never bled at all, and wore them for only 8 hours tops as you should with a real binder. I think the sagging could be a long term affect, but I don't know how long you'd have to bind for that to happen.
     
  9. Awesome

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    My friend used to bind by layering a bunch of sports bras and it messed with his breathing. He got winded very easily. If the sports bras feel like they're pressing on your chest a lot, you need to give yourself a break. Please be careful.
     
  10. DemiLiHue

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    Thanks. Still my mom thinks it could have terrible side effects like tumors or breast cancer. Poor mom lol
     
  11. Michael

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    ... Or just go to the doctor with her, and at some point request a private talk with the doctor. Once you are alone with him or her, you could provide some information about hormone blockers and say you'd like to try that. You have a right to talk to your doctor in private, and if she says 'she must know', you better look for the doctor yourself. Don't just let things go, after all it's your own body, and nobody but you owns it.

    Sport bras seem to be safe, and also wearing lose clothes, which works also well for hidding other stuff.
     
  12. DemiLiHue

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    My mom lets me bra bind now! Thanks everyone!
    Yeah I'm gonna wait to have bigger boobs for my mom to understand me. I always wear a loose shirt. Never tight ones:icon_bigg

    Also my mom says feeling uncomfortable, anxious and weird about breasts it's part of growing up. Is that true? She says that's not dysphoria, it's what normally happens to girls...?
     
  13. InfinityonHigh

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    (YAY!)
    As to what your mom said... It's true that puberty be awkward and uncomfortable, even for cis people. But dysphoria? NO Just NO. It irritates me so much when a cis person tries to say they know how a trans person's dysphoria feels like. I've never once heard of a girl that despised having breasts and wanted them gone. Dysphoria. Is. Real. It. Is. Not. A. Normal. Part. Of. Growing. Up.
    (Hope this didn't become a rant instead of advice)
     
    #13 InfinityonHigh, Jan 4, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2016
  14. DreamerBoy17

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    I'm really glad your mom is letting you now.

    Honestly, with the dysphoria thing, my mom sometimes also tries to downplay it with me... Says my anxiety, depression, and dysphoria issues mostly stem from being a teenager, when in reality I know that 90% of it is trans related, and almost all panic attacks are dysphoria based. Don't let her downplay your dysphoria in your mind. You're real, and dysphoria certainly isn't typical of cis teens.
     
    #14 DreamerBoy17, Jan 4, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2016
  15. KawaiiANGEL

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    Don't know what you should do but I'm just gonna warn you, I went through a brief phase of binding using duct tape (painful as it sounds) and I got really addicted to it, even though it really hurt and as a result have a bad back at the age of 15 and I wish I hadn't done it.

    Binding can be very addictive.
     
    #15 KawaiiANGEL, Jan 7, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 7, 2016