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Possibly Bigender/Genderqueer or Trans?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by soulseeker11, Jan 4, 2016.

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  1. soulseeker11

    soulseeker11
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    I'm not quite sure where I stand gender-wise, and maybe others are in a similar position.

    I started having gender confusion at around the age of 8, but throughout my life the dysphoria has come in waves, some gentle, some huge. I was quite repressed & identified more as a man than my female birth gender as I got older. After an intense whirlwind of emotions, I found the trans community & felt at home. The "title" of FTM felt right, finally. I was gung-ho about my new found inner revelation & wanted to start the transitioning process, although I was hesitant about hormones.

    Fast forward almost 2 years to now, and my dysphoria has eased up considerably. That inner gender discomfort I felt has become minimal, still there but in sleeping mode. I have done extensive inner work as well so this may explain a lot. I've also come to realize that my female side isn't ready to go anywhere, as I feel like taking T would change me too much. I feel the opposite with the tatas & plan top surgery soon, but not T.

    I currently live as my female birth gender & don't pass at all for a male. I identify more on the male/masculine side but I feel as I'm a duality, both genders in one form. Maybe the dysphoria for me decreased because I finally understood more of who I am. Just not sure at this point.

    When I think of someone who is transgender I tend to think they have deeper dysphoria issues and/or identify with one gender more specifically, or exclusively.

    Anyone else in this situation or can relate?
     
    #1 soulseeker11, Jan 4, 2016
  2. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    You're definitely not the first one thinking they might be binary trans, but hesitant because they think they're not trans enough. It's very common.
     
    #2 Invidia, Jan 4, 2016
  3. always twinning

    always twinning
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    I feel a lot like you do most of the time. There are just so many options and it's so hard to know which identity is the right one. I feel like a guy a lot of the time, I'm not sure if I'm completely a guy and if ready to give up all of my female identity. I wish answers came easier with things like this.
     
    #3 always twinning, Jan 4, 2016
  4. JackIsANerd

    JackIsANerd
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    I identify as trans and I have pretty mild disphoria most of the time. It isn't constantly severe like some people so I always doubt I am trans. But I always remind myself that I am not happy in this female body and I would be happier living and seen as male. Thinking of myself as a man just feels so right that I don't let the lack of dysphoria get to me!

    Don't let the idea of mild dysphoria convince you that you aren't trans, just do what feels right! You could be bigender, trans, or simply genderqueer in the end just go with what makes you happy. (*hug*)
     
    #4 JackIsANerd, Jan 5, 2016
  5. soulseeker11

    soulseeker11
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    I appreciate the replies & insights! And true about how dysphoria shouldn't define one's trans status.

    I'm not gonna try to find a label for myself, time will reveal the answers. :slight_smile:
     
    #5 soulseeker11, Jan 5, 2016
  6. Mojan

    Mojan
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    I can definitely relate! Sometimes my dysphoria is a lot and other times I'm totally fine with myself. Its horribly confusing. I don't know about hormones and top surgery cos I'm scared that I'll regret it one day.
     
    #6 Mojan, Jan 6, 2016
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