Lately I've been thinking about college. I'm not worried about academics and while I'm there, although most good schools that offer film are ludicrous to get into. I've been thinking about how much money and time I'll need to transition. I want to dress femininely every single day and tell everyone that I'm female, but my voice and body will give me away. I don't know how much time I'd have from when I move into a dorm or apartment to work on my voice, make up, and fashion or how much time I'll have to get my hands on girl's clothes. Generally, my voice and appearance are my main concerns. I also worry about getting people to respect my name and pronouns, especially teachers and people I befriend. I also worry about finding and paying for resources. Like, finding them is one thing, but paying for them is another. My parents will not pay for anything, so I'm on my own. I have maybe a thousand dollars in my total life savings, which will hopefully increase when I get a job (hopefully soon). But I've seen stuff saying that you'll need 20-50 grand for transition depending on insurance. Advice? :/
First of all, if you're doing well academically in school, then it shouldn't be too hard to apply and get financial aid of some kind like grants, loans (although you might want to avoid loans ), or scholarship. Many colleges offer great opportunities for financial aid. The best thing to do is look into colleges that have your preferred major and contact an admissions office and ask questions. You can get free brochures and whatnot by signing up to be part of their listings. Financial Aid Info Cappex : this is a good site that makes it easy to get in touch with colleges or them with you. You can easily become part of an email list, learn information by them, unsubscribe to specific colleges any time, or get included on the list that provides actual mail letters and brochures all for free. All you have to do is sign up and put in your academic like GPA, school, name, grade, interests, preferences for type of colleges, clubs or sports you're part of. CollegeBoard is another great tool. You can easily get information on majors, SAT/ACT testing, careers, college information, a map/list of colleges by inputting your preferences and desires, tips. You can even save colleges into a planner folio to review later. Very, very resourceful. CollegeXpress is similar to both,giving you extensive info on colleges, programs, scholarship opportunities and more. Also remember that you don't have to pursue your major right away. You can go to a two year university first, complete all your undergraduate work, then go into your major. Four 4 universities also allow this, and it's always okay to switch majors. As for transitioning, you can always contact someone from the college to see how they handle transgender issues. Many universerisities have GSAs and clubs for LGBT, and some make generous accomodations to support you. Have you researched trans friendly states yet? Some states will protect your gender identity by allowing you to use the bathroom you want and even dorms in the best case scenario. Trans friendly states are more likely to provide these accomadations and respect your pronouns and name preference. In any school they allow you to use your preferred name even if it isn't your birth name, and if you go to the right colleges, they will let you use the correct pronouns, whether they match your ID or birth certificate. You can even google trans friendly colleges! State by state info on Trans Civil Rights Like I said, if your academics are really that good and you put an effort in now, you'll get on most colleges radar and it'll make it easier to get accepted. You can get a job and put more money aside for your transitioning savings, but also put some aside for the traveling and moving expenses for going to college as scholarships and grants don't provide this!!! If you show dedication, colleges will show devotion and support. And remember it's best to apply to more than one college as a precaution! And you might need money for the college applications which can get really expensive, some even up to a hundred dollars. And make sure you find good recommendations/references, whether it's your teachers or if you get to work, your colleagues. It's overwhelming understandably, but putting in the effort for research will really go a long way and hopefully, allow you to save your funds for transitioning as you please. Also, there will be some people that won't respect your wishes, there always are, but you just have to stand your ground, or in some cases, the best thing to do is ignore them unless it gets out of hand. Never be afraid to reach out for help on harassment or bullying.
I'm what NYC calls "average" and my main concern is my GPA is like 2.8 according to naviance (even though my own math says 3.3) and my recent PSAT score was a 990/1600 (which is apparently low af). So many schools require like a 3.4 GPA and almost perfect SAT and ACT score. Plus, I'm not at a level to take AP classes, and a lot of schools require them. Some of them also require college now courses, which I can't take due to scheduling problems. The one school I went to see, that I really liked, doesn't offer normal scholarships. And my parents, even though we're still on the border of middle class, make just enough money that we don't get any financial aid. Plus, I can't prove my native American heritage, so I can't get financial aid under that. When my sister applied for financial aid, and she was going to the local college that accepts anyone with like a 1 GPA and low SAT scores, she got nothing. We've always been exempt from things like that for [Insert pathetic government excuse]. I've gotten plenty of brochures and stuff, and I have looked into quite a few schools, but I'm not "allowed" to contact schools because my mom thinks that I'm going to get hacked and lured into a 60 year old man's apartment by sending an email to a college. My school does have us use college board, however they only really use it for PSAT/SAT/ACT scores. With the whole major thing, I really want to pursue mainly film/cinema studies. I really don't want to work excessively hard in bs classes that have zero relevance to what I actually want to learn. I don't want to repeat high school on a harder level. But, I know I don't have a choice. No matter where I go, I know that I have to take all the bs courses. But, I want to spend most of my time studying my desired major. Every school I've looked into has non-discrimination policies and LGBT clubs/organizations on campus. However, I can't find one of these schools that actually takes care of trans people though. A lot of schools that offer film basically say "Oh. If you're trans, than that's okay. Discrimination against you is not allowed. But, we're not going to help you. We'll supply counselors, but you're on you're own. Would you like a brochure of our LGBT club?" I would really like to find one of those schools that actually helps people transition and provides healthcare/medicare, but that's most likely not going to happen. I really want to go to film school in California, because what beet place to learn film? Plus, they're very LGBT friendly. But my parents forbid that, "It's too far away. If you go there, we can't get to you and you can't get home easily. And do you know how much that'll cost?" and I'm just like Many schools I've looked into say that they send information home to your parents with your name on it, so if you change your name legally or in school, your parents will know about it. Soooo, I'm like "Aww maaannnn!" like Swiper. Lots of schools due allow you to use preferred names and pronouns over you official paperwork. As much as I would want to legally change my name and stuff, I can't afford the risk of my parents finding out and freaking out over it. Yep. I understand where you're coming from. Thanks for the advice! ^-^ I have dne research, I guess I just lack the guts to contact schools. <3
If you're 18, then you are a legal adult. Your parents won't really have that much say unless they are supporting you financially or with a car or something... If the chances of you getting financial aid are slim, you will probably have to take out student loans. You need to complete a FAFSA file to learn what you are qualified for in federal aid, and you will need to ask the colleges you apply to about financial aid. Although cinema/film studies sounds really interesting, you need to think about what you want to do for the rest of your life after college. Do you want to be a photographer? Do you want to direct movies? Do you want to work for a film company? Come up with a goal, a way to support yourself after college and pay off the debt that got you through college. If for some reason you figure that you can't support yourself on film studies alone, think about other things you might enjoy doing, and consider a double major. If I think of anything else, I'll let you know. Good luck!
My parents will most likely be giving me money from time to time, and they'll be paying my tuition. I don't think they'll stop paying though, they'll most likely freak out and try to force me to move back home. It's a thing. :/ I don't really want to take out student loans, and my parents don't want me to either. My sister did the FAFSA form last year, and a few weeks ago. She only go 1,000. But I do need to do more research into it. I really want to do my own thing after college. I want to run a free-lance media company that I could run through YouTube and Twitch as well as the outside world. I want to have a company that's as big as Disney or Universal someday. It's like, the only career dream I have. I also want to do as much stuff as possible in my life time, which basically means everything. I will most likely get random jobs while in college, and same after. If worst comes to worst, I'll just go for civil service or federal jobs. If anything, I'd take business on as a secondary major. I would also like to study emergency service and become fully certified in everything from security to aerial fire fighting. I have some things in mind. Thank you! ^-^ <3
Hello, Perhaps tell them that most parents worry about letting their child go off to university, so their feelings are normal, but it's at this stage you need to do what's right for your child as it's in these years that they begin adulthood and need to get the best out of it (education, experience).
The school stuff seems pretty much covered so I'll skip to transitioning. The best things you can do to help you visually pass is learn your makeup now and get comfortable with it, grow your hair out, thin/shape your eyebrows and figure out how you're going to get rid of facial hair. If you don't have much facial hair plucking is a good option. If. Your starting to get a beard you are more limited. Laser is good but ain't cheap, electrolysis is better but even more expensive. If you're going to shave, get on YouTube and learn how to cover a beard. After that the next thing you should consider is hormones. If you're certain you want to transition the time to start is now, while you still have some bone growth going on. People who start at your age get better feminization especially in the hips and brow areas. Hormones are pretty cheap if you go the informed consent route. Doctors and tests will run around $1000 the first year and less later on. In the US Wal-Mart has Spiro and estradiol on their $4 prescription list so if your doctor knows which strength and qty to write the script for its pretty cheap. Some people do pass without hormones but it's easier with them.
Thanks for the replies you two! ^-^ Secrets5, I did talk to my dad yesterday about going to California and getting educated out there among other education things. He doesn't like it, but both him and my mom could be convinced if it came down to it. It's still going to be a battle though. :/ Jiramanau, thanks for the tips! I will take your advice. Electrolysis is something that's high on my priority list, and I do know it's expensive. I hope to get a job and save my money for my transition. If worst comes to worst I'll just take out loans or something. Unfortunately, I can't get on hormones now. Even if I could, I would need an arm and a leg and two years of therapy to get them. I'm only out to my mom and sister. My mom says that she won't support me trough this. She's been pretending I never even told her. I would have to wait until I went away to college. :/ I'll work something out, a plan. I'll do that now in word. I'll type up a plan and post it in a new thread later. Thanks again you two! ^-^ <3
Okay, don't quote me 100% on this but doesn't Medicaid in California cover SRS. I thought I read something about it. And you move for school and are no longer on your parents' insurance couldn't you qualify? (Also note I know next to nothing bout insurance. Another thing to add to the list of things they don't talk about in high school)
No problem. One of the big draws for me wanting to go to college in Oregon (yes going to college at my age) is the LGBT/Trans-friendly laws, and that their Medicaid has an SRS coverage I believe. I actually found this helpful when looking at places. I can do some googling and see what I can find for you. If you don't want to move to the west coast then there is the thought that NYU has a film program and from I'm read on reddit they tend to be trans friendly.
Medicaid is supposed to support the transgender community on their medical need, but from my understanding they're still having problems regardless of it being a government insurance. Insurance companies have a lot of kinks and regulations and loop holes, and if they can find a way to get out of something or postponing it, they can. So while this is supposed to be the true, I think it still has a long way to go. Will some people get easier access to HRT and SRS? Certainly. Everyone? Not at this point. If you want to go for this Natasha Elyssa you'll have a lot of research ahead of you. Furthermore, you can always find lists of trans friendly colleges on google. Most colleges are usually STEM or Arts positive and these fields are usually impartial to the LGBT issues whether or not they have a problem with it. They just want good, intelligent people to represent them. You mentioned above your academics weren't the best, but they aren't the worst. There are always ways to improve this or make yourself look better. If you're really worried about it, you need to try joining a club or start volunteering. If you volunteer you can get a lot of opportunities for full paid or half paid scholarships from colleges themselves. And many colleges offer financial aid if you talk to them after or during the acceptance process. Good luck!
Yeah. I don't want to be where my family can get to me, so NY is out of the question. I read up on medi-cal and stuff myself, and it does look nice. Plus, California is like the best place to study film and it's rated as one of the most LGBT friendly states. All in all, I like Cali. I am also aware of the problems surrounding it, but it's better than nothing. I know how I can improve, except it's out of reach for the moment. Maybe next year I'll be able to do some more stuff. Thanks you two! <3
I feel the same way about California. I feel like that's where I'm going to head to as well. The only other place I'm considering is Reno, but that's because they have a clinic there specifically for transgender individuals! Somewhere on YouTube there talk about this on a transgender panel. I don't have the link right now, but if I find it, I'll post it and maybe it can be of some help to you, if only with information.
