I'm new to this whole thing.. The other day I started to question my gender. There's been times when I thought I wish I could grow a beard. Especially when I was younger. That's all I wanted was to pee standing up, grow a beard, and be able to shave my face like my dad. I went out in full boy's clothes binder and all the other day. I didn't feel better or worse. I do plan on doing it again next time I leave the house just to keep on getting a feel for it. I'm just trying to figure out where I belong. I remembered how happy I was when I first came out as pansexual, and I want to find that sense of fulfillment again and figure out where I stand gender wise. Part of me loves being feminine and wearing dresses, but I've always felt comfortable in guy's clothes as well. I don't know if that's just because they tend to hide more of my insecurities, or if there's more to it. I've never liked being called by my name either. Like my name is something you'd call me only if I did something bad. I would really appreciate it if someone could help me find where I belong
I wish I could help but I genuinely don't understand. What is the question? What is your gender or how to find it? I admire your bravery to dress completely like a boy, bind and stuff. It seems so much at once. And going out this way. Wow. I don't know how guys on here would agree with me, but I come from a place where I never wanted to be a guy. I actually tried to avoid it. I didn't want to be able to pee standing up or shave. But I don't sit when I pee and I don't know why. I mean, I have a theory, but it's not something I consciously chose or admired. And I used to experiment a lot with bronzing powder, but I had no idea that shawdow on the face has something to do with facial hair. I was actually disgusted by the idea of facial hair Hiding insecurities with men's clothing? Why? I just can't understand. Do what you like Be yourself Wear what you like to see yourself in. If you like dresses - wear them. If you like to dress like a dude - dress like a dude. Dress up, if it's fun for you. See what feels like you - then you'll find out who you are.
You might also look at the genderqueer labels. It's not necessarily just man or woman. Clothes don't define your gender. The answer to where you belong can be given only by you yourself. Good luck.
Wanting to pee standing up, grow a beard, etc. as a kid is pretty common for trans guys and can often be a sign that you're not cis, although it's certainly not a guarantee. If you still have those feelings fairly often, you're probably not cis. How do you feel about your chest, hips, voice, etc.? How do you feel about she/her pronouns? How do you feel about people thinking you're a girl when they see you?
Sorry it took me so long to get back. That's more or less what I've been looking at. More of the genderqueer lines. Genderfluid doesn't seem to fit right to me. I still have the feelings occasionally like that which is kind of why I started questioning in the first place. I don't really have any body dysphoria in that way. I'm quite fine with my voice, chest, and hips, but if I'm trying to dress more masculine, I try and hide those things. I haven't really changed my voice though. Sometimes the pronouns bother me. Sometimes hearing they/ them pronouns make me happy, and sometimes he/him make me the same way too. No one has ever seen me as anything other than a girl, so I can't say whether or not I'd feel better being called something different.
I can really relate to this as I feel kinda similar but the other way - I think it's a case of experimentation and finding which labels you think fit your situation best but you don't even need to put a label on it, just do what you enjoy doing, be yourself and that's the only label you really need
That is how I've been thinking about it lately. I'm just doing whatever right now. If a label comes along, that's great, but I'm totally fine just dressing one way one day and another some other day. I really appreciate all the help from everyone :3
This is how I'm also approaching gender at the moment. I think it's good to focus on yourself for a while without afixing a label, otherwise it's just like trying to force yourself into a box, and there are sooooo many labels that I think without doing that, there's a good chance of going through a bunch anyway (which is fine, but sort of stresses me out going through ones that don't completely fit). Then again, some people just *know once they've found the one that fits them, so everyone's different, I guess. This post triggered a memory actually, which I had completely forgotten about before. I used to try stand up as well when I was younger (really young) I didn't realise it was a common thing in trans guys... Here's a site that I stumbled across yesterday Transition? It has some really good questions for introspection. Hope it helps :smilewave
