Trying to balance my faith with my identity. I'm so confused...

Don't ever repress who you are. If God would be so hateful that He would want you to torment yourself for the rest of your life, how can He then be a loving God worthy of placing faith in?

 

1- God made you. That means he made you born "a boy" but he also made you a girl. do you really think he didn't made you feel like a girl? (I'm not Christian but I've always thought that)

2- Look: if you repress this, it will come later in life. Worse than ever. Not good idea.

 

Hello there,

I am a Christian trans-man (currently pre-transition), and I can empathize with where you are coming from. Personally, I struggle with the exact same questions. I've poured over every possible mention in the Bible that could do with the transgender question, and the simple answer is that there isn't a simple answer. But I believe, as with what the "proper Christian stance" on homosexuality is, that a lot depends on one's personal conviction. As long as you are seeking God and His will first in your life, I don't believe you can go wrong. Some questions we may never have a definitive answer for, and this we just have to learn to be okay with.

But I'll tell you what I do know...

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11

God promises to never forsake His children, and He - unlike any human being - has a love which is truly unconditional. So whether you are gay, trans, black, white, rich, poor, man, woman, child... It doesn't matter because He loves you regardless. The whole point of the Gospels is that Jesus came to save everyone. He came to the ones which society rejected: the lepers, the prostitutes, the tax-collectors, the demon-possessed. And He loved them, touched them, healed them. Over and over the message of Christ's ministry rings clear: it doesn't matter who you are or what has happened to you, God loves you and can use you for His purposes exactly as the person He creates you to be, in the purpose He planned for you before you were even born.

"There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus." Galatians 3:28

What I take this verse to mean is that gender or societal status is ultimately irrelevant in terms of what is actually important. If you are a disciple of Christ, you are only called to do two things...

Jesus replied, "You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments." Matthew 22:37-40

We are not bound by the Old Testament (e.g. all the Jewish laws). Of course we can still learn from them, but that is not Christ calls us to. He doesn't care about us keeping a book of rules. He cares that we love. Love Him and love people, which includes ourselves.

That said, this is more or less the conclusion I've reached in all of this...

By staying female, as I was assigned at birth, I am living in a constant state of hate, pain, bitterness, and shame. I am barely able to function. I don't believe it is His will that I "accept" or condone lifelong misery based on the pretense that because Adam and Eve were cis-gendered heterosexual human beings, that every other human being in eternity must also be the same. I don't accept that because, looking around, it isn't so. There are many horrible disorders and ambiguous conditions people are born with. There is a huge scope of natural variety in people (race, sexuality, gender, etc.) and I don't think that it is inherently wrong simply because the Bible doesn't mention it explicitly. I digress.

I think that God would convict you if it were wrong. Deep down, you know if it's right or wrong. And if you feel at your core that transitioning is a sin, in that tugging feeling in your gut, then I believe it may well be. He doesn't let us wander around blindly. He gave us His Spirit for a reason - to ascertain what is right and wrong then to carry out what is right no matter the cost.

I have tried so hard, by my parents' pleading, to believe that transitioning is wrong. But I can't bring myself to. I just don't see what is so evil about just wanting to live. I think that God made me male, my mind and soul and everything I am, but with a female body. I'd like to shrug my shoulders and say I have no clue why He would do "such a horrible thing" but, in reality, I have no right to say that. Because I do know why, at least partially. Sometimes we have to have it hard, maybe even have it "the worst," so we can trust God to be our strength and to aid us through our struggle. So that in the end we can carry hope to other people who are going through exactly the same thing. To let them know that they are not alone, never alone. And if that means I have to fight for my body and privilege to be called a man, so be it.

Sister, we are the carriers of the "good infection." Christ gave it to us and He told us to go and give it to everyone else. That infection is hope in a hopeless place. Light in the darkness. A reason to live, even especially as the beautiful transgender person He made you to be.

I have so much more to say, but I'll leave it at that. I would be open to talk to you more about this if you want. Particularly I could share more of the Scriptures which have encouraged me in my journey thus far. Below I'll list some further Biblical reading you may be interested in, as well as a song:

-Romans
-2 Corinthians
-James
-Mere Christianity (by CS Lewis)
-the song "Us For Them" by Gungor

Your brother in Christ,
Alec

 

if i could just add to this wonderful post, go to WWW.Godmademegay.com there are 6 affirmations that explain how God and Christ dont hate us; and for more indepth reading, which i highly recommend, there is the letter to louise that the site is based off. this put in words what i had felt and knew on a spiritual level even before i came out to myself. it applys equally to being gay and being trans.

for what it's worth i am Christian, Queer, and Trans (Bi Gender).

hope this helps.

 

To believe in a god who would condemn someone to hell for being who they are invalidates the concept of infallibility and omniscience.

Formal doctrine of the church is hypocritical and oppressive.

It's the teachings of Christ that matter. Not adherence to condemnatory zealotry.

 

You seem to know the Bible itself doesn't address transgender identity, so if you've chosen to follow an inerrant understanding of the Bible, that doesn't seem to be the issue.

You say you're hearing a lot of conflicting opinions, and it's making you worry that you'll make the wrong choice. As far as that's concerned, my advice would be to avoid letting other people determine your religious beliefs for you. Listen to good advice, but don't let anyone pressure you into believing something if you truly and sincerely disagree. Also, if you're sincerely trying to find God's will, that itself matters a lot more than getting it right. If you make a mistake, you'll find your way again with time. Don't spend so much time being afraid of getting things wrong or missing God's will for your life that you forget to live.

I do think there's absolutely nothing wrong with being transgender. Most "Christian" arguments against it rely on huge logical leaps and inferences that simply aren't justified by the actual words in the Bible. And from a secular perspective, the wide consensus is that transitioning is much better for you psychologically than suppression. But I don't have anything to add to what Kodo has said.