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DETAILED! TMI- I do not know what to think-frustrated

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by GreenEyes623, Mar 14, 2016.

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  1. GreenEyes623

    GreenEyes623
    Regular Member

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    Location:
    alabama
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    I grew up always playing with boy things and never liked dolls or pink and could never make friends with girls. I still really don't have friends that are girls and I'm in my 20s. I have realized that I am definitely not straight. In my mind, I feel like a man. I feel like my conscience is a man. I want to be strong, independent, dominant. I am very feminine looking and people tell me how pretty I am. I wear makeup to go along with being a girl. I cut all my hair off for a while and liked wearing guy clothes. I wish majority of the time that I had a penis and could have sex with a girl. I am still attracted to guys and have a boyfriend. He knows that most of the time I feel like a guy and allows me to be dominant sometimes. I am emotionally attracted to guys, but can only really finish if I think about doing a girl like a man. It is quite confusing. Sometimes I act like a guy and it weirds people out. So most of the time I dress like a girl and try to giggle and be happy like most girls. I try to talk to girls, but they usually totally bore me with all their gossip. I really don't have friends because of this. I just don't know what to do or how to connect with people or even how to have friends being like this. Oh, and I basically tell no one any of this. :confused:
     
    #1 GreenEyes623, Mar 14, 2016
  2. AgenderMoose

    AgenderMoose
    Full Member

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    Location:
    Missouri
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Do you think that perhaps you're trans? That sounds like quite a bit of gender dysphoria you've got. Either way, I really think that you should express yourself for who you are, not what others set you up to be. If you want to present yourself as a different thing than what is considered normal for girls, then go for it! I know it may seem hard to break out of societal norms (especially in Alabama, I totally get that Bible Belt/Southern blues) but it's the best thing for you. If there are friends who can't accept you for who you are, then as harsh as it sounds, they probably aren't the best friends to be around.
     
    #2 AgenderMoose, Mar 14, 2016
  3. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    Location:
    Far above the clouds, gazing deep below the Earth
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    ^what they said

    You be you.
     
    #3 Invidia, Mar 15, 2016
  4. noaaah

    noaaah
    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Sao Paulo
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    It sounds like you already have control of your life, so you should think about dressing as a guy or how you see yourself as and act like you feel like it's you. People who matters will support you. It does sound like you're trans, maybe genderfluid if it's not all the time that you feel like a boy. Just try to do what makes you feel the most joyful and content despite other people's looks or comments. That must become less impactant on you when you realize feeling good with what you are is better than repressing it to fit in the expectations of people who dont understand you so it shouldnt matter.
     
    #4 noaaah, Mar 15, 2016
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