Name: Noah Pronouns: he/his I DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK I AM AND IM ALREADY 18 Sometimes I'm cool with being feminine, but most times I just want to go on T and wear different clothes. More masculine ones. I'd loooove to get my hair cut short, but I'm aftaid it wouldn't look nice and also my parents wouldn't be cool with it and I don't feel like hearing I'm awful all day every day. Maybe I'm agender, because I don't feel like I'm anything, but my gender expression varies from stereotypically male to female. Sometimes I think I put effort into looking feminine to pass as this person I'm supposed to be.
Hey, Noah! Don't worry too much about not knowing your gender identity and being 18. I just figured out I was agender last summer at 17. It's a time process, and even then you don't have to put yourself under a label. Just go with what seems comfortable. Stereotypical gender expression does not identify who you are, especially with clothing. I often wear baggy clothes, buy unisex t-shirts, and once the summer roles around, I'm finally gonna be wearing swim trunks, yet I'm still okay with wearing dresses and planning on wearing one to prom. Fabric has no gender~ Maybe you're agender, it's quite possible. I have similar feelings on what I want to wear, but that's all mood and clothing, not gender expression. Have you thought about genderfluid? I can't really speak for what you are, but perhaps it's something to look into. I hope this helps!
18 isn't all that old tbh. And not in a "you're too young to know" kind of sense, but in a "you have plenty of time where not knowing is still perfectly normal" sense. I mean, I'm 3 years older than you at least and I'm just barely starting to figure myself out. And I'm not a really immature person either, this is just not trivial to figure out. Let yourself off the hook. Do the things that make you feel better, honestly. If it won't make you feel better to cut your hair, that's not a requirement. Just do the things that do help a little.
