Like everyone saw that already well summer is coming in a few months and it makes me scared... I seriously don't know what I will do... The reason is because I'm trying to figure if I'm trans or not and the summer is the worst part because in the winter It's like I can do what I want, hide my body and just stay in my room al day if I want too. But in the summer no the swimming part is the scripts for me whenever I go swimming I'll just look at the others how their bodies look like and I'll just stay in the corner by the side of the pool hiding my body cause I hate it and I don't like that when someone sees it. The problem is that I hate swimming and the worst is that my mom forces me too and she always wants me to come with her at the pool but I hate going to the pool I never have fun there I'll just get depressed there. I just seriously don't know what to do in the summer like I'm comfortable right now cause I don't have to care about my body and I hate shaving my legs I don't want anymore to do that. I'll feel weird if I don't over the summer I just feel comfortable with my legs not shaved. The worst is that I'm not really aloud to wear what I want like my mom always wants me to put nice girl clothes and be a beautiful girl and everything while I don't want. And in the summer my mom will not let me wear what I want for sure like I don't want to wear shorts I just wanna wear pants and seriously not girly clothes or like too sexy that shows my body. When I'll go shop for my summer clothes she'll force me to buy things that I don't want while I'll want to stay with my pants and hide my body and everything. I don't know what I'll do. By the way I'm planing to cut my hair short before the summer maybe and If I do seriously no way that I wear girly clothes I just don't want to wear things I don't want. Can someone help to figure out what I'll do if I will not want to swim and hide my body all over the summer or whatever????
Can you find some activity or group that only operates during the summer that you could sign up for now so you'll be too busy for swimming? Some sports team or drama club? Something that will have set times you need to be there to properly participate. Or volunteer to help foreign students see the city? Helping at musical festivals? Not sure how old you are but there are bound to be tons of activities in the summer you could sign up for.
You don't *have* to swim. Have you thought about purchasing boardshorts and a rashgaurd for swimming? If you want to avoid swimming, see if you can volunteer at say your local library.
