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Uncertainty about my gender

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Unimaginative, Apr 4, 2016.

  1. Unimaginative

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2016
    Messages:
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    Location:
    Cambridge
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Hello everyone. I'm new to this site (a friend of mine suggested asking about my feelings here) and was wondering if anyone could help me.

    I'm MAAB, but usually find I identify more as female. I think since about 12 or 13, I've felt like if I could have chosen my gender, I would've chosen to be born female. I prefer being with girls to guys most of the time, and have quite a feminine personality. I've tried wearing womens' clothes before and like the way it makes me feel (in an emotional sense rather than a sexual one), and feel uncomfortable with my body as it is; for instance, I shave my body a lot because I see it as a sign of maleness.

    Whilst I have considered I could be trans, I'm not sure it would make me feel 'right'. Whilst I know people who have transitioned in passing, I'm worried about the implications it would have on my life and on people around me. I think I might be genderfluid, but on the other hand, as I'm biologically male it's much harder and less socially acceptable to present as female in public, which is a big part of what I wish I could do.

    Does anyone have any idea what this implies about my gender?