hey. lately I've been having some issues with my gender identity, I think. I'm nearly fifteen and bio female, and I've always been a little tomboy-ish, then for the last three years I've been more girly because teen years. but now I'm wondering if I'm genderfluid/queer? Sometimes I get really upset when grouped with the girls, and I seem to get along better with guys. I very very rarely wear anything girly, I'm almost always in black/grey hoodies and jeans. my hair is long but I often think about cutting it short. however it seems to change on a daily basis? some days I'll wear something girly and obsess over cute clothes and other days I just want to wear hoodies and jeans. sometimes I hate being called daughter or girl and sometimes I love it. it's very confusing and I'm not sure if it's just a phase or hormones or something? idk. I know I'm not transgender, because I don't want to be a boy. is this how genderfluids feel? :icon_redf
I really don't know, but this is how I felt a little while back when I was questioning my gender identity. Just be yourself. That's all the advice I can come up with, sorry...
How do you see your gender when you don't want to be grouped with the girls. Do you feel male...or no gender at all?
As someone who identifies as gender-fluid, I describe it thus: I'm male-bodied, and most of the time I feel male, and masculine. That said, there are times when my feminine side wants to come out and express itself. Those times I feel very female, despite my biology. I've always been more in touch with my "softer" (to use a somewhat loaded term) emotions, and have always easily made friends with women. I have friends of all genders, and feel attracted to people, not necessarily biology. I have learned over the last 15-16 months to express that female side of myself more readily and present as feminine when I do. I've never calculated a percentage of time male or female or in between. I take it day by day and when I am going somewhere where I feel safe to do so, I present as female. (I live in a state that is not super queer friendly, so safety is important to me.) So I guess gender-fluid means that my gender presentation varies with my internally perceived gender. I have some traits that are always feminine (I have long hair, and long, well-kept fingernails), and some behaviors that are always feminine (I always wear panties as an inward expression of my femininity). For me it's been a journey of self-discovery and I've had really excellent support in it from family and friends. I wish you luck as you discover yourself as well. It can be a wonderful journey, and it never really ends. Morgana
