okay i'll admit i'm becoming more unhappy with myself as the days, months, years, go by. maybe transitioning socially is enough for me? idk. i'm slowly excepting the fact that i'm not completely cis. i don't have extremely strong dysphoria - i enjoy sitting at home without my binder but i love wearing it when i'm outside cuz i feel more at peace and myself. but yeah... i enjoy being referred to as male. and cis folks usually are happy with the gender their born as so? i'm trans in a way... also then i'm thinking if testosterone will solve my depression? i don't/didn't (?) want to take testosterone but now i'm thinking about the changes and of course i'm terrified cuz of doubt, regret, ect. but at some times i try to imagine how happy i could be/want to be f that makes sense? but it could be just my imagination. do i just transition and hope that it cures my depression/dysphoria? < this isn't crippling but it's more of an annoyance y'know. but what if my depression becomes worse cuz then i regret transitioning? i know some changes are irreversible. i used to be really excited about downstairs growth and facial hair but now i'm a bit weird with it. maybe just pushing myself to start testosterone will help me in the long run? i'm just so annoyed and i hate being indecisive about everything. :dry:
