Am I even trans?

Idk why but I'm just wondering all of the sudden if this was all just my imagination and me buying into it. Get ready for a really long post.

So here's the reasons I think I'm trans:
-People in public seeing me as a guy just felt weird and the feeling annoyed me 'cause I didn't understand it.
-Many times in the past I'd think "if I were a girl (back then I didn't know the difference between sex and gender) I'd do this (I'm referring to all sorts of things, not just stereotypical woman things)" but it felt pointless 'cause I thought I had to be a guy.
-Whenever I tried picturing my future as a guy it all just felt wrong but I forced myself to do so anyway thinking that was the only way. One day I let my imagination free and pictured my future as a girl and everything felt real and alive. I didn't feel shy in my own brain anymore.
-My fantasies living as a dude really scared me at times but mostly just felt really boring and un-interesting. Pointless almost.
-I once had this creepy fantasy after I heard the word "sex change" at school. I'll describe it briefly: Some creepy gang take me fro my home to an abandoned, horror movie styled hospital and give me a forced sex change. In the fantasy I pretended to be upset but I kind of wanted it to happen (note: back then I didn't understand that there's a lot of differences between AFAB and AMAB bodies; I though it was just chest, genitals, and something facial that I couldn't quite understand)
-Whenever I see an AFAB person, I get so jealous to the point where I have dreams of getting fictional brain swaps with one (who in that fantasy would be a transguy).
-I felt like my life as male wouldn't allow me to fully express myself and I'm not referring to clothing or make-up, I actually liked picturing myself exactly the same just with a different body and voice.
-When I first got onto EC, seeing a female avatar, name, and being called a girl felt so great whereas even before I knew what being trans meant, whenever somebody called me a "young man" or grouped me in with other guys and referred to us as "the boys", I felt so frustrated, even misunderstood. Worst would be when people would tell me how I'd grow up to be a handsome man who all the girls chase after.
-In 7th grade, I felt so weird seeing my body hair, hands, and genitals grow. I felt like there was something out of my control (puberty).

The thing is, my dysphoria isn't as bad as some of the other trans people I see on EC and other parts of the internet. Like, I can still enjoy my life. I can ignore my body really well. I see my hairy legs and I forget their mine. I do hate it when I return to reality but only on some days does it really get me down. On the rest I either ignore everything or fell like a cis girl (although the latter are really rare). I also sometimes like my male body like a costume but I think of it like a girl with a male body. I don't associate with it but sometimes like it as if it's a costume I'm forced to wear ("sometimes" is key). Also, there were a few times before I realized I was trans that I thought to myself "Thank goodness I have a male body" which is made weirder by how I already experienced some discomfort back then. So what do you guys think.

 

Thanks guys