I wanted boobs then, but now I hate them

I feel ya, bro. I was eager just to be an adult. Now I don't care for being a "woman".

 

I feel ya, bro. I was the same way. Everyone in my life made entering girl puberty and womanhood was this epic, exciting, life changing event that would bring me closer to being viewed as an adult! (The ! Is for the excitement they flourished it with)
I was the first of my classmates to need a training bra and then a real bra. At first it was a distinction that brought me elevated status but...other people, boy, noticed. "Got Milk" jokes were passed around, which was understandably upsetting, but more so was the fact that how they treated me differently where months before I was like them. I managed to ignore it though, after all budding boobd can be ignored.
Then my friends started shaving and having periods. I was feeling left out and left behind when among girls, everyone was growing up but I was feeling sort of the same. Then I got my period and the words "welcome to womanhood" were uttered and I felt a physical sickness store. I felt like a ship suddenly caught in a storm at sea.
But I ignored that too because everyone said I was girl and I knew no different and I wanted to be like the popular girls of my school. I loved hanging with the boys but I wanted to be accepted by those I was suppose to be like.
Then I was 13 or 14, looking in a mirror and hating the very things I should love. 15 or 16 and I was falling into a deep bit, a monster wrapping tentacles around my ankle and dragging me deeper every time I looked in the mirror or took a shower or saw myself naked. And the people around me helped me stop fighting as they whispered the things i loved about myself were what I should hate and that I needed to hide them because I would be picked on. How can you fight the sea monster when you can't tell up from down any longer. 17-22, the cold has numb me and I just go with the flow of the currents, does it really matter where I end up? 22-now, a light at breaks the darkness, and glimpse into a shattered piece of glass that distorted the reflection and I saw a glimpse of him/me. He was up and I was down, and I need to get to where he was. And thus the struggle begins again.

(Sorry for long winded and random reply)

 

I felt similarly. I didn't particularly want a specific feature girls around me were so excited about, but I did feel like being an adult was the only way I'd feel normal, not knowing that the reason I was so unhappy was because of my assigned gender and not being a child.

You're not alone, man.

 

When I was kid, I never ever wanted boobs. Then came puberty and a classmate, big boobs and loved by everyone appeared. I connected big boobs = great social life and therefore wanted bigger ones too. Then I got over it and didn't care. But now I want them to just go away, I mean it's summer and I want to run around shirtless like every other man!

 

Man, right there with you. I was so excited to finally be a grown-up. (Little did I know, you may never actually grow up, and most adults feel just as insecure in their adultiness as you do. ) The boobs, though. I was excited to get them, but once they showed up, they were just weird and uncomfortable. They feel suffocating, like turtleneck sweaters or necklaces whose chains are too tight. Ugh.

 

Same here, except I also wanted a bigger chest at the beginning of/some what during puberty too, not even just before it started. Ironic, isn't it? I was at that state of mind where I knew very little/nothing about transgender anythings, and my desire to be look good, be more attractive, and the pressure I felt to have a bigger chest as a "girl," meant that I wanted a bigger chest than I had. For some time that was my wish, for some time after that I even wore push up bras and low tank tops, to try and do what I saw other girls doing (since I was still fully convinced I was a cis girl at that point), and to try and look good doing it. That lasted for a while.

And then as I became more self aware down the line, for some reason I felt the urge to try binding. I don't even remember why, I feel like I might have been experiencing dysphoria of some type, but anyhow I ended up trying binding and the euphoria I got from that was incredible. After a lot more introspection and self discovery gender wise, I'm now real grateful that my chest isn't that big, and now I desperately want a flat chest most of the time. I was so eager to be a "proper woman" and an attractive one at that (a pressure that I still sometimes feel, ironically enough. Being seen as a girl by everyone and all that), that I sort of dove into all that without second thought. Turns out I'm not even a girl.