I'm a girl currently very confused about her sexuality. I've spent so many night getting no sleep because when I'd wake up in the morning, I would just feel depressed. Depressed about the possibility of others judging me, or how I don't really fit into my school. I do have a friend group, and they're great. Anyway's, I'm going to tell you about my feelings. I always told everyone, or acted, that I like guys, or thought they were cute. I guess I never really felt anything toward them, they were just there to me. For the longest time also, I never really felt anything towards girls either. This was the way thing were going for me and I was totally chill with it, I didn't mind. The first feeling of anything like a crush, was towards a guy. This guy was nerdy, sweet, geeky, smart, funny, and generally just a great guy. for a period of like 6 months, I convinced myself that I had a son the guy. I really just assumed that since I liked him for his qualities, that I had a crush. Anyways, 6 months go by and I slowly just stop having a crush, and he just turned into my best friend instead of a crush. Now when I was younger, I thought girls were pretty. Like a "Ooh that's a pretty girl." So, not really any attraction there. There was this girl that goes to my school, and I've known of her since basically forever. We aren't friends though, It's more of a "I know you exist for a long time thing". She's nice, smart, pretty, etc. I sat next to her in a class. This one day, everything kinda shifted on me. I was in my class with her next to me, just kinda writing down notes and listening to the teacher. 15 minutes go past and she poked my arm because she needed some note about the topic. And when I looked at her my stomach like lurched and I just kinda froze inside. So I give her whatever note and when the class ended, I basically ran out of the room. So the next few months, I would feel that way, or butterflies in my stomach when she was around. My heart would race and I would feel twitchy sort of. During those next few months, I started noticing other girls and began feeling that way when I was around them. In the class while this was going on, I usually put my head down and feel ashamed that I was feeling this way. Flashing to now, I still feel this way around lots of girls, and a few guys. I think I may be a Lesbian, but I'm just so confused about the way I feel that I can't really make a decision for myself. Whatever I am, if it's not straight, my father will kick me out. He has no tolerance for any LGBT+ person, he basically hates them. I'm very worried about what will happen. -Thanks for reading this
