When I'm with my family I kinda lost myself into the image that they have of me, it's the same with friends or random people, I feel like an entity attached to a body when i'm in public, when they look me or treat me as a boy it feels so empty and meaningless, like if wasn't myself at all. So yeah when someone look at me i'm much aware of the fact that I was born biologically as a male and it feels wrong. I know I'm a girl, in fact I always knew that in a unconscious way and I'm in plan of coming out. I day dream a lot about the day where I could start HRT and get FFS, and when my best friend (she's the only one i'm out) calls me by my decided female name it's SO GREAT, like butterflies on my stomach... But when I look my face at the mirror I feel so disconected, I mean the ilussion of feeling like a woman it's gone and I start to feel trapped in a body that don't matches me, that's the best explanation I can give. I struggle finding my inner-woman when i'm in public or with family, i'm not out of the closet yet but, What can I do to feel more connected with my innerself whether i'm in public or with my family?
