My best friend joined a site where she could talk to other people about jfashion, lolita to be precise. It has been a passion of hers for years and I have often been her back up when she wishes to wear her lolita clothes around town. Everything on the site was going well. She said everyone was polite and gave gentle criticism if need. She struck up a conversation with a young 14-18 year old (could not tell for sure) about the prices of dresses in some lolita stores, one place having their cheapest to be around $200. The teen said they could make theirs for $30 and that any sort of fashion is cheap if a person knows how to sew. Curious, my friend look at their profile pics and saw the dresses in questions. She did say they were nice but not as good quality as the store bought one, but still impressive. She then said something along the lined of "but it needs a petticoat " From what she has told me over the years petticoats are a must in lolita fashion and a dress without one does not count as lolita, or very good lolita anyway. This teen went off on my friend. She started calling her cis scum and a bully. The teen said that he was a boy and that because of that he didn't have to wear the petticoat. He said he was a fashion designer and he knew that rule was bullshit. He said my friend was just being a bully and cis scum My friend has apologized plenty to this guy, which I feel she doesn't' need to. She accidently misgendering him and as soon as she realized the mistake she switched right to masculine pronouns. She simply informed him that the dress needed a petticoat and that every guy she has seen in a lolita dress (we've seen a handful and they all rocked it) was also wearing a petticoat. In my opinion the 14 year old is being over sensitive. But I want to give my friends others interpretation of this situation.
I think everyone involved is oversensitive. I don't think anyone is right or wrong in this situation, everyone is just offended over misunderstandings. Either call it what it is and neutralize the situation, or walk away.
This kid went WAY overboard. She probably didn't know he was male or trans at all. Sadly, people like this bring a bad name to the LGBT community.
My friend was offended so much as she doesn't't like offending others. But she only told me about this after she dropped the conversation because he didn't want to stop arguing even after she apologized and she doesn't't want to be banned.
I agree that under the described circumstances, the guy who went off on your friend is in the wrong here. especially if the thing about the petticoat was said in a constructive way, as opposed to a rude/matter of fact way.
That pun xD She updated me on it. It seems that he gets into a lot of arguementd on that site when someone doesn't agree with him. This time it resulted in him being banned. He had a friend write a letter saying he was giving up on fashion and that site all together because they clearly are not Korean and can't understand. I guess this started a whole conversation with people pointing out that 1) the fashion in that site is Japanese fashion and that 2) even if it were Korean he himself is a white American so they have no idea what point he was trying to make saying that. A lot of trans people on the site also spoke out against him saying that he is misrepresenting them. Seems several have had negative encounters with him on Tumblr as well. Well I have my answer anyhow. So that k you for the replies.
That sucks. He's immature and has anger issues. And I think you do need a petticoat for those dresses.