Confused at separating Gender and Sexuality

I honestly would say you might be trans. Not every trans person experiences gender dysphoria, some experience what is called gender euphoria (the overwhelming feeling of happiness and comfort and "this is right" when your preferred name and pronouns are used).

It's also possible that you are genderfluid, if you feel no disconnect with being female and still like to be female at times. If the experience is that you're somewhere in-between male and female rather than flipping between the two, you might be an androgyne.

Don't be worried about "meeting the standard", there's a lot of trans or NB people that experience the sense they "aren't trans enough". The idea that there's a certain level of trans/NB that you need to meet is ridiculous to me, you know how you feel and if you feel a way that doesn't quite tick every box it doesn't matter. You're within your rights to identify as how you feel most accurately describes you.

For relationships, it really depends on the specific person. If they see you as the gender you are (be that male or fluid) and are okay with the sexual aspect, then they'd be a good match. For some straight/gay people, having genitals that don't match your gender identity is a dealbreaker, but there are also straight/gay people that don't care if the genitals match. My two boyfriends are good indicators of this, I'm a pre-op transman and they both identify as gay - one feels repulsed by the idea of sexual contact with a female, and we still get along just fine.

 

Uh, honey. You're trans. All you have to do is express yourself, and pick a label you feel describes you. Don't get hung up on gender stereotypes, they are barely half truth. The reality is that there are lots of feminine men and masculine women, that there is as much variation within each gender as there is between an "average" man and woman. Being trans isn't about what you like or how you behave, it's about how you see yourself. Clearly you really like being perceived and treated as male, a woman wouldn't enjoy that. I sure didn't like it when a guy at work called me a "manly man" yesterday, and I was welding something while sporting 3 days worth of stubble at the time .

 

What does being trans mean to you? Which things do you want? Which you don't want? How do you feel best describing yourself? What seems accurate? What works for you? And how do you want to express yourself in this dimension? How do you want to look? Do you want to transition all the way or just come out to a couple of people who are important to you, or who you think would be supportive? Try things out It's all about you being hapy with yourself and your life.