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Songs giving me feelings

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by SystemGlitch, Aug 17, 2016.

  1. SystemGlitch

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    I feel like I'll be laughed at for saying this in real life, but I just gotta tell someone. First off, I'm not a cryer. I don't cry at movies or situations (exception being Shark Week). However, there's a lot of times that I'll be watching a kids movie of some description, and then a song will happen, and suddenly I'm in tears because of "trans feels". The song just fits so well with how I feel/how I want to be and just. Gah.

    The first time it happened was with the song Reflection from Mulan, and I still have to fight back crying when I hear it now:

    Look at me,
    I will never pass for a perfect bride, or a perfect daughter.
    Can it be,
    I'm not meant to play this part?
    Now I see, that if I were truly to be myself,
    I would break my family's heart.

    Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me?
    Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
    Somehow I cannot hide
    Who I am, though I've tried.
    When will my reflection show, who I am inside?
    When will my reflection show, who I am inside?

    And today it happened with blinking Let It Go from Frozen:

    (Bolded the main lyrics that relate)

    The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
    Not a footprint to be seen.
    A kingdom of isolation,
    and it looks like I'm the Queen
    The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
    Couldn't keep it in;
    Heaven knows I've tried


    Don't let them in,
    don't let them see
    Be the good girl you always have to be
    Conceal, don't feel,
    don't let them know
    Well now they know

    Let it go, let it go
    Can't hold it back anymore

    Let it go, let it go
    Turn away and slam the door
    I don't care
    what they're going to say

    Let the storm rage on.
    The cold never bothered me anyway

    It's funny how some distance
    Makes everything seem small
    And the fears that once controlled me
    Can't get to me at all

    It's time to see what I can do
    To test the limits and break through
    No right, no wrong, no rules for me,
    I'm free!

    Let it go, let it go
    I am one with the wind and sky
    Let it go, let it go
    You'll never see me cry
    Here I stand
    And here I'll stay

    Let the storm rage on

    My power flurries through the air into the ground
    My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
    And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
    I'm never going back, the past is in the past

    Let it go, let it go
    And I'll rise like the break of dawn
    Let it go, let it go
    That perfect girl is gone
    Here I stand
    In the light of day

    Let the storm rage on

    The cold never bothered me anyway!

    There are more songs that aren't directly LGBT related, but still give me really intense emotions when I hear them. And the majority of them are indeed from bloody kids movies.

    I feel really weird that this happens to me so frequently. Does anyone else get moments like this over general songs?
     
    #1 SystemGlitch, Aug 17, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2016
  2. InfinityonHigh

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    I feel you on this. (btw, was the let it go one taken from another EC post?)
     
  3. Kodo

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    Yeah, quite a bit actually. I even have a playlist on Spotify that is full of trans themed songs and basically every time I hear those songs I start sobbing. I don't know why I do that to myself.

    Anyway, the most obvious "anthem song" for me as a trans-guy is from the movie Treasure Planet. It's called I'm Still Here (Jim's Theme) and here is the link if you want to take a listen:

    https://open.spotify.com/track/6BfOhpHADzrvKN2kMPTMPv
     
    #3 Kodo, Aug 17, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2016
  4. randomconnorcon

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    I use music for when I write, using the themes and lyrics to help develop scenes because the songs fit my characters/situation. But I have to stop listening to some songs because I always tend to lead them back to how I'm feeling and what I'm doing and where I want my life to be. Reflection from Mulan has been getting to me ever since the movie came out when I was about four, that song made things even worse once I heard Christina Aguilera's version a few years later. Because I didn't understand why I felt so wrong, just that I did and this song proved it.

    It doesn't just happen for trans feelings either. MCR's I'm Not Okay is one I gotta stop listening to because it just is my life.
     
  5. SystemGlitch

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    Nope, my niece was at ballet today and one of the songs she danced to was Let It Go. Had to excuse myself because I didn't want to burst out crying in the middle of the hall.

    Damn, I remember seeing that movie as a kid, I need to watch it again... that song fits so well too. I swear some of these writers are secretly marketing to us. :thumbsup:

    I'd never heard Aguilera's version and just gave it a listen, it's so good. I love the song I'm Not Okay too, a lot of MCR's stuff is so good and I think it's perfect for the "outcast" kids. I was always partial to The End when I had very dark days, especially the lyrics "if you look in the mirror and don't like what you see, you can find out first-hand what it's like to be me", "another contusion, my funeral jag / here's my resignation, I'll serve it in drag" - there were a few points when my main motivation to stay alive was that if I died I'd be buried in a dress - and "when I grow up, I want to be nothing at all".


    I will say it's certainly a relief I'm not the only one who feels this way some songs. :lol:
     
  6. randomconnorcon

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    There was a point in my life when that was my only motivation to stay alive, too.

    MCR was literally my teenage years. I still love them.
     
  7. Kodo

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    I second this. Damn, "I'm Not Okay" and other of their songs basically saved me.
     
    #7 Kodo, Aug 17, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2016
  8. InfinityonHigh

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    I asked this because I made a thread similar to this in the entertainment section a while back, and I did similar things with Let it Go.

    http://emptyclosets.com/forum/entertainment-media/192309-song-trans-ish-feel.html

    (also i really love MCR)
     
  9. SystemGlitch

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    Ah, I joined this site less than a month ago. XD So didn't know that thread existed. Sorry if I kinda stole your thunder.
     
    #9 SystemGlitch, Aug 19, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2016
  10. InfinityonHigh

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    Nah it's cool. I was just kinda surprised to see someone have pretty much the same exact reaction to certain songs.
     
  11. OldDog1952

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    I can relate to what your saying. Throughout my life I'vie heard songs that I have related to. But the one that really struck A nerve & brought tears to my eyes (also from A movie) was Angel from City of Angel's. I bought the sound track & used to listen to that song over & over while I was driving alone. It felt like the writer got inside my head & read my thoughts. Or at least lived A life similar to mine. As for being in the arms of the angel when I die. I can only hope this will happen in the end.
     
  12. SystemGlitch

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    That is a beautiful song, I always really liked Iris from that movie too. The movie itself is so sad though. My mom called me a monster because I didn't cry at it... but I was crying on the inside. :tears:

    --

    Was watching Disney movies with my niece today and came across Son of Man in Tarzan. Coming of age songs seem to have a record of coming across with trans-undertones.

    Oh, the power to be strong
    And the wisdom to be wise
    All these things will come to you in time
    On this journey that you're making
    There'll be answers that you'll seek
    And it's you who'll climb the mountain
    It's you who'll reach the peak

    Son of man, look to the sky
    Lift your spirit, set it free
    Some day you'll walk tall with pride
    Son of man, a man in time you'll be

    Though there's no one there to guide you
    No one to take your hand
    But with faith and understanding
    You will journey from boy to man

    Son of man, look to the sky
    Lift your spirit, set it free
    Some day you'll walk tall with pride
    Son of man, a man in time you'll be

    In learning you will teach
    And in teaching you will learn
    You'll find your place beside the ones you love
    Oh, and all the things you dreamed of
    The visions that you saw
    Well, the time is drawing near now
    It's yours to claim in all

    Son of man, look to the sky
    Lift your spirit, set it free
    Some day you'll walk tall with pride
    Son of man, a man in time you'll be

    Son of man, son of man's a man for all to see