Do transmen have the same confusion of fetishism that transwomen do?

I don't know for sure, and I'm definitely interested in finding out.

If I had to guess I'd reckon it probably has something to do with the fact that it's perfectly acceptable for women to wear men's clothing, but for men wearing women clothes is a more "taboo" topic and a lot of people see it unacceptable. A good amount of people get aroused by "taboo" topics due to them being "forbidden", so it becomes a fetish - then because "men don't wear women's clothes", I suppose a man who DID enjoy wearing women's clothes might consider whether or not he's actually a man or whether its a fetish, regardless of if arousal is involved.

That is just a guess tho. I could definitely see it working in reverse, with a woman who identified as a woman but just liked to dress up as a man sometimes.

 

I don't know. I've never felt any awkwardness about buying male clothes (beyond frustration because they don't fit properly) so I can't really relate to that feeling. Like I said, was just a guess.

 

For the most part, women can already wear men's clothing without it being considered strange. I'm a cis woman and mostly only wear men's clothing. I don't get questioned.

There is a difference between being a trans woman and liking to wear dresses though, and it is possible that, some of the time, these people questioning are not trans women at all but instead are cis men who crossdress as a fetish. They just don't realize they can be men and be aroused by women's clothing (what do people think drag queens are)?

Note I'm not saying this to invalidate anyone, since I do know there are genuine trans women who have this problem as well. I'm just saying that the strict gender roles can be confusing and harmful to male people to the point it sometimes leads to questioning. But I also know trans women that never wear "women's" clothing and have a more tomboy style.

 

I think it is more common for trans women for many reasons, mainly the fact that women's clothing tends to be more easily and universally sexualised than men's clothing, and that men in general have a higher sex drive and therefore may be more prone to having certain fetishes. There's even a controversial theory that states that some transwomen who transition later in life may have a fetish called 'autogynephilia', which means that they are, on some level, sexually attracted to the idea of having a female body. So far the same phenomenon hasn't been discovered for trans men.

I myself have been confused about my gender before because although I'm a trans dude, I still am attracted to the idea of transforming into a woman or being forced to wear feminine clothes for sexual purposes. I worked out eventually that this was just a fetish because after I thought about it, still having a female body afterwards felt like a cruel joke or something. 'Okay then, I've had a bit of fun, now...can I have my male body back please?...Guys?...'

 

Yup...it's weird, I know, but the best comparison I can think of is a cis man being a transvestite, which does happen. Just because a cis guy likes forced feminization doesn't necessarily mean he wants to be a woman, and having a female body at the moment is super uncomfortable outside that context.

 

Well, trans women have been fetishized for forever because of how 'deviant' the display of femininity is. Especially now with the internet, it's super difficult to do research on transfeminine identities without coming across some porn site. Most cultures (especially westernized ones) have a huge bias towards sexuality, and not gender. Obviously we have the gender/sex binary working out here and we're all basically raised with the idea that if anyone does anything weird it's because it's kinky because everything is sexualized. Things aren't super gendered, unless they're gendered female because of how, again, sexualized being female it is.

However, men aren't super sexualized like women. Making dudes hypersexualized is something people do in comedic movies or advertisements. It's not taken as a real threat, because men are supposedly the top and it's normal to want to be a dude. The world's generic default person is a man, so when 'women want to be men' it's not because dudes are hot and we're sexualizing them. It's because, of course, everyone wants to be a dude.

I feel like there are a lot of different issues that transmasculine people have to deal with (ex. paying into the patriarchy, abandoning being representitive of a minority group, accusions of being antifeminist, those sorts of things).

 

Well, I'd say there's a marked difference between how I felt in men's clothes and in women's clothes. Before I worked out I was trans, part of the gender dysphoria I experienced (and still do) was a sense of 'rightness' about wearing suits. I felt powerful, dominant and like someone who would actually be listened to, and wearing feminine clothes in public made me feel invisible and worthless. For example, I had to attend a school dance a few months ago and my mum made me wear a dress, wear makeup and wax my legs beforehand and my dysphoria's been a lot worse ever since.

If this is something you feel confusion about, I'd suggest you examine why exactly you enjoy wearing gendered clothes and how you'd feel being seen by other people as the gender they're associated with. When I wear dresses, it's purely within a sexual context because I like the feel of the fabric and the illusion of powerlessness they give me. But if I wear feminine clothes in public, I feel exposed and like I'm a female impersonator. I'd say that it's best to try and understand how you want others to see you and how you see yourself in a regular context as well as a sexual one.