Gender queer -- what does it mean?

It's similar to non-binary but can have more political or performative connotations I believe, that's why I never used that label.

Without knowing how your friend is using it it's hard to say, but no it's not really the same as crossdressing or about gender expression it's usually more about identity.

 

Most people I know that use genderqueer use it because they know that they are not cis but don't really know where exactly they would fall under the trans umbrella - trans male/female, bigender, genderfluid, agender, etc. They just know that their gender identity is something different from the gender they were assigned at birth. For the genderqueer people I know, there definitely is more to it than just "crossdressing". Your gender identity isn't about how you express yourself (so not the clothes you wear, or your haircut, or the way you walk or talk), it's about who you feel like you are inside - for example, I am trans male, inside myself I have always felt like I was male even though I have a decent mix of masculine and feminine traits and interests. I have altered my gender expression to be more masculine so that people will see me how I see myself - as a man - so your friend may be doing something similar. By being more feminine they may be expressing their inner gender identity in a way that they couldn't before. The important thing to note though is that even if I wore dresses all the time and had long hair and painted nails I would still be a man. Likewise if your friend always wore suits and ties and had a big bushy beard, they would probably still be genderqueer. Gender identity is also completely unrelated to sexuality, so your friend being attracted to girls really gives no indication of their gender.

Like the above poster said, though, without actually talking to them directly it's hard to say what the label means to them. Different labels can mean different things to different people, so for someone genderqueer might mean "I have no gender" while another genderqueer person might say "I am a mixture of male and female" and yet another genderqueer person could say "I am not male or female, I'm something else entirely". Some people use genderqueer just to mean that they don't follow the stereotypical gender roles, rather than considering it an actual gender identity. It's something you would need to talk to your friend about if you are interested in understanding more about how it applies to them, but do be aware that they might not be willing to talk about it or that some questions they might be uncomfortable answering - if that's the case, you shouldn't push them, but let them know that you're interested in learning so that you can better understand their identity. It leaves the door open for future conversations if ever they feel comfortable sharing with you.

I hope this helps, and I think it's great that you're looking to learn more about your friend and their identity. (*hug*) One of the best things for a trans friend is to be supportive and affirming of their identity, it goes a long way to helping them with self-acceptance and comfort.

 

I think it's just a synonym for 'non-binary' for simplification.

 

I believe that "genderqueer" just means that they are non-conforming to whatever gender that was assigned to them at birth.