FTM sex

If you don't like your body, you can always wear a binder/shirt, and a strap-on over your actual genitals. I know some trans men who do this.

 

I don't have the same issue but I know a lot of trans guys do. I pretty much think of myself as having a small penis, and my boyfriends refer to it as my penis as well, which makes me feel a lot less... unequipped, I suppose is the best way to put it. It means that I'm okay with that particular portion, but any further down (or inside) is a lot less okay. I'm becoming more comfortable with touching as I become more comfortable with them, though, and I'm already a hell of a lot more comfortable than I initially was. Socially transitioning has also helped my confidence, and even though I don't pass anywhere near as often as I'd like to, just the knowledge that I am in my view living as a man makes me feel more assured and at peace with myself, even though I do still crave those T-changes and feel very at odds with my body most of the time. Being around people that I trust and find comfort in helps ease it, and sometimes I forget that my body isn't what it's meant to be.

I don't know if the same will happen for you with your partners - if it doesn't, that's perfectly fine, even some cis guys have strict no-go zones when it comes to sex. I have a trans friend and he doesn't masturbate or even look at his genitals and he is also dreading the time that his girlfriend wants to have sex. Like I tell him, though, if your partner cares about you and respects you, then you wearing a binder or a strap-on or even keeping all of your clothes on and only using your fingers on them shouldn't be a huge upset for them. As long as you tell someone up front that that's how you feel, it will be okay. It might be harder to find someone who is willing to become closer to you knowing what your boundaries are, but when they do come along (and they will) you know that they will be someone incredibly special.

 

I'm exactly the same. Even though I have sexual desire I can't even begin to think about being intimate with someone to the point of undressing. It makes me panic and gives me immense anxiety just wondering about it. Honestly I'm not sure I'll ever feel comfortable enough for sex and that's bloody disheartening. Dude I'm not even sure what to suggest, I mean other than HRT and SRS which I'm hoping will make life a bit easier for me. Finding someone you trust 110% may somewhat help?

 

Full disclosure: I don't quite identify as FTM but I do experience persistent gender dysphoria. So, I guess take this with a grain of salt.... Everyone is different, but what has worked for me when I start to feel self-conscious about the parts I have/don't have is a partner who, like SystemGlitch mentioned, sees me the way I want to be seen. Aka, when they view my body as masculine of center and attractive in that way, and even use language to frame my body in that way (e.g. wanting to be penetrated by me, saying cock, etc.). At base, as I said, I'm a little more genderfluid so that might not work for you, but I wonder if having a partner who views you as male can help you both understand your body that way.

Totally understand if you want to disregard this suggestion from a non FTM, but just a thought!

 

I also can relate a lot to this. I have a boyfriend who only really sees me as a woman, so that's gunna get complicated when I begin the process of transitioning in the future. Whenever we were in bed together I felt absolutely nothing. Nothing physically or emotionally. And it's not that it was the first time for the both of us, or nervousness or anything like that. It's not any kind of lack of skill in bed or anything, it's ME. Because of how my body currently is, I don't feel at all like a woman, so being intimate as one I feel nothing, no stimulation or anything. Also, I'm not really physically attracted to him at all, just emotionally sorrta. It always just felt like I was in bed with my best friend, which is basically who he is to me. Again, it's not his fault at all and I would never ever dream of hurting him, but this is my issue.
I have desires just like everyone else, I would love to get intimate with a guy or maybe a girl it depends, but the only way I could ever see myself being like that is AS a man. I wouldn't mind too much being on the bottom if it's with a man, but as long as I am one because I feel something imagining myself as a man during all of that.
I don't know if being fully male will entirely fix my intimacy issues, but at least I would feel a hell of a lot better and it would be easier for me to reach any sort of climax which I have been unable to feel on my own.

 

If you are worried about pleasing a partner with her also feeling like she is pleasing you, I just got something in the mail a week or so ago that might interest you...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LwwIoyiMpnY

It is a "dick" that you can attach to yourself with ridges that go against your body. I have yet to use it with my fiancee, but I have used it solo a bunch of times and now I pretty much never masturbate without it. You just put some lube on the base and rub it against your own anatomy and it feels like you're jacking off. It is meant to be used with a partner so I imagine it feels pretty great that way too, and you can even stick a little vibrating bullet in the base if that will help. I used it that way at first but quickly wore out the battery and now I use it without it and it works just as well tbh...

There are a lot of things like that that will provide pleasure for both parties, but this is just one that I've personally used, and I started using it when I was pre T btw.

 

It's not all sunshine and daisies though! Coincidentally we just got in a big fight about this very thing last night...Our sex life has suffered greatly due to my dysphoria and depression. We only have sex about once a month these days. I told her a while ago I was ordering that thing I mentioned. She was pissed when she found out I got it a long time ago and have just been using it to masturbate while she gets nothing lol...

Thing is, she's been talking about wanting to experiment with that sort of thing forever and I've never really wanted to before I came out as trans like six months ago, mainly because I was afraid she would want to use it on me and I couldn't explain why that made me uncomfortable. Now that I'm more willing to experiment she acts like I'm just going to jump right into it and suddenly not be dysphoric because I'm on hormones now. And she wants to make everything about her.

Sex and relationships are definitely hard when you are trans. I can really see the appeal of dating another trans person at times like these...communication is important I guess and we are just not great at it. I feel like she will never get it.

 

Any time .

I must say so far T hasn't affected my dysphoria much at all, but to be fair I have been on it for about a week and a half now! I do think I feel a little more emotionally okay in general and maybe even more confident, but it really hasn't changed me physically yet except for some bottom growth maybe and rise in sex drive. I do think maybe that has helped my dysphoria a little just because I felt kind of emasculated by my poor sex drive recently. Now that I have to jack off twice a day I feel like a proper teenage boy with testosterone flowing through my veins. lol Better late than never.

Once I put on 15 pounds and my voice starts to drop I imagine that will help a lot. And that shouldn't take too long!

Glad to answer any other questions you might have. Also, thanks for the add, and I do suggest checking out other trans youtubers. The guy that did the review I sent you is Chase Ross and he is my favorite. He is very sex positive, so he may be especially of interest to you if you are wondering what your future sex life may hold for you.