Warning: Kind of messy and overly-detailed So I've recently put together a plan with my therapist to talk to a trans-boy whom I've mentioned in quite a few posts by now. Even with Vivase and anti-depressants, I'm still a pretty shy person (though there have been some very noticeable and welcome changes) so we decided I was gonna hand the guy a note. I think I know which locker is his but am not 100% sure (around 85%-90%). I wrote it last night and went extra early to school today (I told my mom I just wanted to experiment what walking to school in darkness would be like) and then folded the letter to fit it through the slits on the locker. In the letter I basically state I'm trans, he's trans, he could give me advice on how to speak with my parents after school (I told him to pick when), that he should write his response on the same paper and put the paper on my desk in history class, and that what I did is admittedly kind of creepy (putting a note into the locker of somebody I rarely talk to). I also added that if this wasn't the right person that they should hand it to who I wanted to hand it to (he's really open about his gender and sexuality so it wouldn't be a problem to him but I may have outed myself as I wrote my name as well). So far, he hasn't given me the sheet back. I feel like I may have missed my one chance. And what if some random person now knows I'm trans and thinks less of me? Basically after all this I'm asking if anybody's got any good advice on how to approach this guy at school considering he's always got somebody talking to him and sits halfway across the room from me. I know he's in our school's GSA (which I've already started a thread about) so should I just pay a visit to there once? But I just feel like I'll either get spotted or somebody in the club will tell others of my gender ID. Again, I'm very sorry if this post is hard to get as I can be messy when writing down my thoughts. Thanks to those who respond.
Talking through notes does tend to be easier, however there is always the question of whether the person will get it. I think going to the GSA would be a good idea or try showing up to class early?
Crap, I saw the guy I was referring to today at his locker and which was at least 4 lockers away from the one I placed the letter in. After school ended, I went to the front office to get help and opened the locker only to not find the note. What do I do?
Yeah well it wasn't in the locker so whoever uses that locker must have taken it. Perhaps he/she threw it away without reading or maybe saw the last paragraph I wrote saying that if it's not the right person, they should give it to that guy. I just have no idea. Maybe the right person somehow got a hold of it. I'll try finding out on Monday.
There isn't much you can do about the first note, but if you know which locker is the right one now you can write another note.
I don't know which locker it is but I had the idea of in-directly asking him about it and that if he doesn't have it, I'll hand it to him and say somebody else wanted him to have it. Does that sound like a decent idea?
In my experience putting notes in lockers is always risky, there's a chance it will be the wrong locker or they will simply not notice it among other papers and books. If you try his locker again be sure it's the right locker, and perhaps put the note in a small envelope or write his name on the outside so he will see it right away. Giving it to him in person isn't a bad tactic. You'll know for sure he got it. You don't have to explain or say it's from someone else, just say 'this is for you' and walk away. Does he know where your History desk is? If he leaves a reply on your desk, is there a chance someone else would see it, or throw it away? If it's possible I would suggest asking him to meet between classes or after school instead. At that point you can figure out when he is available to talk to you.
How about you just look over at him just before the bell rings and say, "hey man, can I talk to you for a second after class?" Have a note written to hand him in case you lose your nerve, but be prepared to chat it up.
