(This is going to be kind of a rant/vent post I guess) Lately I've been feeling all wrong. I've always been pretty comfortable being a girl, but lately I can't stand female pronouns, hearing my name, when my parents call me "sweetheart," etc. Every time I'm thought of in a feminine way it makes my skin crawl. But thinking about being a boy doesn't feel totally right either. I'm comfortable with my bisexuality as a female but thinking about being intimate with someone as a male just feels weird to me. I don't think I'd ever want to get bottom surgery, which is also throwing me off. I can't figure out what my feelings are and what I truly am/want to be and it's driving me crazy! It's like I could live the rest of my life as a girl, but I don't know if I want to?
I think you might be genderfluid in that your gender is not stable and changing over time. Since you did say you were once okay with being considered a girl, that identify isn't now no longer valid. It could just be that at the moment you are kind of in a "male state" that might go away depending on who you interact with or how you picture yourself in certain situations. It's also good to consider how you would feel in relationships. Are you dominant and feel like being a manly, leader in a relationship gives you pleasure? Are you more submissive and love being the girl that can be swept away? Or are you sometimes one and sometimes the other? If you answered yes to the last one I'd say you're genderqueer or genderfluid. Don't worry, I've been struggling with these same feelings but we will get through this in time :lol:
