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I cannot decide whether I am genderfluid or not.

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by pyrocynicalisme, Nov 2, 2016.

  1. pyrocynicalisme

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    I am a 14 year old homoflexible (bi with a preference) female, and only recently have I discovered being trans and/or genderfluid. I don't feel strongly like a girl, and I really dislike my breasts. I mostly wear pants and gender neutral clothes unless my parents force me into skirts or dresses. I do occasionally, however, love having my hair long and feeling feminine, but I'd also love having short hair, and being masculine.
    I see a lot of people here saying how they feel genderfluid, but would rather not have a dick, or anything. I feel different. I wouldn't mind having male body parts, in fact, I'd like it!

    So the question stands; am I genderfluid, trans, or a serious tomboy? Thank you in advance!
     
  2. darkcomesoon

    Full Member

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    Location:
    New Jersey
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I can't tell you what you are, but I think it's definitely worth exploring your feelings further. How you feel about clothing has nothing to do with gender, but the fact that you don't like having breasts and might like having a male body suggests that you might be trans. Asking questions like "what would I want my body to look like if I lived on a desert island and no one could see it?" and "what body parts would feel more comfortable and natural for me to have?" can help you separate the social aspects of your feelings from any physical dysphoria you might have.
     
  3. Delta

    Full Member

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    No one can really decide for you. A good thing to do at first is to try the terms on to see how they feel. Being called a tomboy was always wrong for me, and transitioning to male seemed super wrong, but being genderfluid and transitioning to nonbinary feels right to me.

    When I was still figuring out my identity, I had a spreadsheet of my gendered feelings, that I used to track my feelings and see if there was a pattern to things that indicated what I may be more inclined to be. No patterns really emerged, but that made me super certain that my fluidity was the most defining characteristic of my gender, and that that's the most important descriptor for me.

    Your journey will be different, but that's good because it'll end up in the right space for you. Don't feel pressured to figure it out in any specific time, you've got your whole life ahead of you, and you're going to have a lot of changes going on for the next decade or so at least. :slight_smile: You'll figure out who you are in time, I promise.