Gender therapist

Mine just asked me a bunch of questions. Like: "how have you felt when you had to wear girls clothes?", "do you want to pee standing up? did you try as a child?", "what does dysphoria feel like for you?", "where do you get most dysphoric about?", "what do you want to do medically?", "how long have you been out?", "how did coming out go?", "how long have you known?", "what childhood signs did you have?", "did it ever make you depressed? how has socially transitioning effected your mental state so far?" (I was already passing as male when I met with mine for the first time), "did you play as male characters in video games/dress as one for Halloween/be male in a game?", "what are your fears about transitioning?", "what would you ideally look like?"

Then she referred me to an endocrinologist. My parents managed that, so I don't know the specifics of how it worked. I have no idea what would happen to a person who wanted to transition to avoid chores or something.

 

I went in a little less sure of myself than the above poster. I was dressing male but not out to anyone and not 100% sure I was even trans. Probably more like 80%. She asked about my childhood a lot mostly at first. A lot of stereotypical questions like what kind of toys did I play with and was I physically rough as a kid. Eventually it moved on to puberty and a lot of questions about how I felt when I started my period and stuff which was weird. After she had pretty much confirmed in her mind that I was trans (which didn't take too long) she started talking about the options I had available to me and asking if I was interested in taking testosterone and how I felt about different surgeries.

At some point, Idr if it was in the first session or the second one, she asked if I wanted to use male pronouns and what name I'd like her to call me. On the second session we mostly talked about how I was going to come out and stuff. On the third session we talked about how my coming out was going and my timeline for transitioning.

Hopefully they should work with you to figure out if transitioning is right for you and move at a pace you're comfortable with, though I almost felt like I was being rushed. She didn't want to play games and listen to me babble on about being in denial. I imagine I could have gotten a letter for hormones on my second appointment if i wanted, but things are probably different in the UK. I ended up not going in for a fourth appointment because I had already gotten what I needed from her (confirmation that I was trans), and the appointments were very expensive. So I went the informed consent route in the end, but I'm glad I talked to someone first.

 

Pssst. Neither do some girls.....

I have nothing to add, just looking to see what I can expect when I finally get to see a therapist.

 

Just so you all know, I kind of think the whole "rough and tumble play" thing is bullshit, personally. Yes, I was a somewhat violent child who enjoyed roughhousing and what not, but I'm sure I knew cis girls who did too. And cis guys who didn't.

 

when I first started talking to professionals about my gender questions, they asked about childhood, if I assumed any feminine roles (even in my mind.) etc.

I posted this in another thread about gender therapy and I think it is beneficial to this discussion as well;

i'll give you the advise that I gave myself, be frank with them and with yourself. they cant read your mind, sometimes it might seem like it though, and be open to possibilities, all of them because you don't know where this could lead, but it will often be authentic.

 

Emerry, I'd offer you a simpler advice. You've been confused for so long that you simply need that therapist. Simply because you clearly have so many questions about yourself, and as great as this forum is, it can't replace interaction and a professional's intuition and expertise. So for your own good, please see one of you only can.

 

I'm seeing a gender therapist this coming 18th, and I posted a similar thread asking about what I should expect. I'm not sure how long in these sessions I need before she decides to give me T and help me transition, but at least talking to someone about it can help me get started. However long it takes I'm not sure. I just hope she doesn't decline my request to transition.

 

I would agree. You think about this way too much for it to be normal.

 

tbh, when I saw my gender therapist, I very much felt like her end goal was just to get me on hormones. Like I didn't get the feeling that she wanted to talk just to help me and she thought transitioning would fix everything. That kind of bothered me so I stopped seeing her once I found out I could do all that without her letter. And I am indeed on hormones now and am very happy about it, I just worried all the time that she was encouraging everyone even if they weren't really trans (I think because she was so quickly convinced that I was trans) so it gave me some doubts. I mean i do believe I am trans, but I also believe most of my experiences as a trans person are not exclusive to trans people. But to be fair, I went in there with the intention of eventually transitioning socially and physically even if I wasn't 100% sure yet.

Perhaps if you are not interested in transition, you should just see a regular therapist with LGBT experience, at least at first.