Hey guys, recently I've been trying VERY hard to appear more masculine. Issue is that I have a skinny, 98lb female body at a 5'5" height, so I look even smaller. I became very motivated in October and started keeping a food book, made sure to eat at least 2600 calories a day (that's 2x my maintenance) and I hit the gym. I was going twice a week, working mostly on upper body. I really wanted bigger arms and delts to try and achieve that triangle shape that's so desired. So things were going great...until my right shoulder started hurting. And the shoulder got worse and worse, even after I decided I better take a break from working out. I had to go to the doctor, and the specialist takes some Xrays and proceeds to tell me that I injured my rotator cuff. Apparently this happened because my delts were indeed getting bigger as I wanted, and this caused them to pull my ligament out of place. So now I'm stuck with physical therapy and have been told not to work out anymore. I was totally devastated. Now I'm feeling desperate to do SOMETHING to help my body become what I need. I had never considered going on T before because the entire idea of transitioning scares the ever loving shit out of me. I know for a fact that I would lose my job. And I LOVE my job. And I would lose a lot of my acquaintances. I have a wife and a best friend who would stick by me, but I've always been too much of a coward to take the risk. But now, with working out and building muscle off the table (at least for several months and even then i'm afraid to start back up....) I was wondering more about T and transitioning for real. Are there any other really skinny guys out there who can help me? Specifically I was wondering how much weight and muscle you gained with T alone. I'd love to start working out again and I feel like my body could handle it better if maybe I started T first. Any advice is appreciated.
First, it sounds like there is more consideration you need to do about whether transitioning medically is right for you. Keep in mind that there is no such thing as being "trans enough" and you don't need surgery or T to make you male or whatever other identity. There are obviously many factors in play with that, but I believe you could benefit from a gender therapist who can help you sort through your thoughts on the matter and get you on T if necessary. If your goal is just to be fit, not necessarily wanting all the side effects of testosterone (e.g. body hair, lower voice, skin difference, clitoral growth, body fat redistribution) then there are other ways if achieving that without putting stress on your rotator cuff. For example, running, yoga, or dance would require less shoulder involvement until it heals. Speaking from a personal perspective as a transguy, I've gone from being fairly skinny to much more fit in the past few years. Though I am not on T yet. At 14-15 years old I was 112 lbs. at my lightest and I am also 5'5" like you. Fast forward to age 16, I started putting in physical work to get fit using weightlifitng. That was moderately successful and I gained 8 lbs. over a year or so. My best progress was all of last year, which was half spent with weights and yoga and the other half spent swimming 1-2 hours daily. This gained me 10 lbs. of muscle, putting me at 130 lbs. currently. I now follow a clean vegetarian diet and daily incorporate yoga for half an hour, swimming for one and a half hours, and some core exercises. Anyway, if you are looking to be fit, focus on cleaning up your diet and being consistent with a variety of exercises (e.g. cardio and strength) that allow for your injury. Even if is as simple as jogging and physical therapy.
Not on T yet, but yeah this is shitty. If you wanna do something I recommend an awful lot of cardio. Outside. Builds muscle on your legs and keeps your body fat percentage low. I'm a slim dude myself and your height. And I thought about that because a low body fat percentage makes you look masculine. But know always that you're not the only skinny guy out there. And you can still rock it. Look at these skater dudes. You just gotta find some good clothing that can play it off as a strenght instead of a weakness.
I probably won't be much help, but I'll try to help any way I can. Just for a reference, I'm a bigger guy for my size. I'm just under 5'0" and as of this going up, I'm 137 pounds and I'm going to hit my second T anniversary in a month. Weight training can help you gain muscle, but it's important to be careful with what you do. It can be pretty easy to hurt yourself if you don't know what you're doing. Also, be sure you listen to your body and know your limits. If it helps, make working out into something fun. For me, DDR helped me lose a lot of weight when I was in high school and it was a great way to have some friendly competition with my friends. For now, I would say to do something light that doesn't involve your shoulder if you absolutely need to do some sort of training. Also, you don't need T to reach your goals. HRT is pretty serious and it's not something to take lightly, especially if there's changes you're worried about.
I completely get you, I'm 95lbs and 5'5 too and it bloody sucks. I tried working out a couple months ago, I went to the gym twice a week, swim twice a week and nothing made me gain weight. All that happened was it was toning my body and making me fitter. Finding clothes that fit helps a great deal with making you feel better about yourself. I have a pretty boyish frame with broad shoulders thankfully so finding shirts that fit (took a bloody login time to find a 12.5inch collar shirt) can do a great deal. I'd really think over you wanting to start T though. Really go through all the changes you'll be getting and don't just think about how it'll make you bigger. It sounds like something that might help in your situation but you should do your research before you decide.
I figured out something that might be helpful to you: Get slim button down shirts. For appearing flat: Close completely. For hiding curves: Wear a shirt under it and keep it open. For getting more of a V-shape: Close only the first 3 buttons. Wear a shirt under it.
These are some great tips, especially from Aberrance. I got to work out for about three months fairly hardcore before I got hurt, and it did just as you said: I didn't gain any weight, jut got more toned. And really...it didn't do much for my shoulders. I just feel stupid putting in shoulder pads under all my clothes, but perhaps I have no choice. I've been torn about taking T for years, which is why I never have, because I know you can't ever go back. I'd LOVE a deeper voice and a more masculine looking body...but I'm not crazy about having facial hair. Thicker eyebrows would be AWESOME though. But I'm not in a place work place wise where I can transition. I'm not ready to lose my job. I love it, and although I may be forced to take that loss in the future, I'm not ready yet. For now...I think the clothes are what's going to help the most. Thanks for all the clothes advice guys!
T is such a weird thing sometimes. You never know what you're going to get, and the outcome might be surprising. I know I'm going two years on T soon and I still get read as being sixteen.
