1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Not sure if I'm ftm, agender or just a tomboy

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Airisofparis, Jan 3, 2017.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

  1. Airisofparis

    Airisofparis
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 22, 2016
    Messages:
    39
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    The moon. It's cheesy up here
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Ok so I am very confused on my gender. I am afab and I've been questioning my gender since June, so about 7 months. I have thought that I was agender to genderflux to demiboy to genderfluid to ftm. Clearly, I'm very confused and can't choose a label which is making me stress about it. Through this I've watched tons of ftm YouTube vids. When the you tubers were telling their story about how they knew they were transgender they were saying things like there have been things in my life that have hinted about me being transgender like playing with "boy" toys or wearing "boy" clothes. And I never had that, which makes me doubt me being transgender. Like as a young child I was a classic girl, wearing dresses and playing with barbies and all that stuff. I'd always wear quite feminine clothes( but i hated dresses and skirts from the age of like 6) until about a year ago when I realised I was gay and wanted to look " more gay"( I don't know). And so I'm confused on wheather I'm not ftm or not and I'm just a tomboy or in somewhere else in the genderness like agender or demiboy or demigirl or something.

    I'm very confused and would appreciate advice and opinions :help:
     
    #1 Airisofparis, Jan 3, 2017
  2. ARC36

    ARC36
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2016
    Messages:
    62
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    USA
    Questioning your gender indent ity can be tough, trust me I'm going through the same thing. It helps to ask yourself questions and analyze your responses. Questions like:

    If I could choose to completely change my gender right now, magically, would I?

    Do I feel discomfort with my body?

    If someone called me by different pronouns would I be happy?
    (For this question it might help to dress/present masculine for a while and see how it feels when someone calls you sir or him or they)

    Do I want to be viewed by others as something other than my birth sex?

    Am I happy with my birth gender?

    In the end it doesn't really matter if the things you like/do are feminine or masculine, what matters is if you have gender dysphoria.
    Odds are if you like being a girl you are one, and if you hate being a girl you probably aren't.

    Hope this helps.
     
    #2 ARC36, Jan 3, 2017
  3. Cailan

    Cailan
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2017
    Messages:
    292
    Likes Received:
    31
    Location:
    Pacific Northwest
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Those questions can help you identify if you're a binary FtM, or not.

    Two other questions:
    If there was a magic pill that would change your body instantly in, would you take it?
    If you were to live the rest of your life on a deserted island, no one to ever see you again, just you and your body, which body would you choose?

    Fluid or bi-gender are less about what you reject and more about there being more than one preference, which may be either embraced or rejected, and sometimes there is some degree of gender dysphoria while you're feeling particularly masculine in a female body.

    I have a male side and a female side that are constantly at odds with each other, and neither is happy with the body I have. My female side is insecure because I have a large, square, more masculine body than makes it happy, and my masculine side is unhappy with having a female body. Do I think about being male? Yes. Do I want to physically transition to male. No. If anything I'd want a femme body minus the masculine attributes it has, which I don't think is an option short of crazy levels of surgery. But then I have a feeling my masculine side would become even more dysphoric. So I have two sets of unhappy feelings all at once.
     
    #3 Cailan, Jan 3, 2017
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)