It's becoming more and more apparent to me that I have to start life from scratch, and I don't know how I'll do that. As I reflect on my 18th birthday, I am starting to accept that I will start life anew by the end of thus year and it's going to be immensely difficult. And I don't know what to do or where to start. I have no set instructions or guide to assist me. I have no information on how the real world works and stuff, they're too busy trying to make us all scientists that can cure cancer. Why don't they teach us how to survive? Why can't I go to school and learn how to support myself, open a bank account, take out loans, cash a check, pay taxes, manage my money, manage an apartment , etcetera. Like, why don't they teach us stuff we'll need to know regardless of what career path we choose? Now I don't know if I'm going to have money to even start transitioning. At least from what my parents have told me, I'm going to be dirt poor digging for scraps and life's going to be horrible. Does anyone have a checklist, or a guide? Does anyone know of any articles that help with this stuff? Where am I going to start? What do I need to do to survive? What do I need to do to support myself while still being able to transition? How do I start my transition? Who do I go to? Where? I'm confused. I am legit going to have to start out with a lot of trouble (loans, food, etc) and I don't know how to deal with it. My parents, and my school, all preach the route of convenience. Go to the local schools, stay home until you're 40, and get a lousy job. So, here's the real question: How does one start out on their own in a strange new place with goals and aspirations such as mine?
Wish I had a good answer... (*hug*) I would start by searching someone to talk to, with internet, facebook... searching for associations in your area, lgbt or even something general. Maybe they would have a counselor. You could also try help lines, just to start or at least to get general tips. I would try to think by little steps, one thing at a time...
Okay. Thanks! I'm going to have a lot of stuff on my plate for quite a longtime. I'm gonna have to go digging.
I have 2 tips for you. 1. get a "lousy job"(I have one where I can't get raises, stuck at minimum wage) It may suck, but it will be a source of income till you find something better. Also, try to save say 10-20% as a "do not touch unless emergency" fund from each paycheck. I may live at home on minimum wage but I'm currently seeing a therapist on the road to transitioning affordably. 2. find a way to establish good credit. part of that,with a credit card is NEVER spend more than you can afford to pay off, and pay off your card on time. Try to pay the card down below 20% of your limit before getting the statement, tnen pay off the rest to 0, ON TIME, so you don't incur any interest on what you owe. that is how to establish good credit and be able to get a loan with a low interest rate(interest on debt, like loans, makes you owe more money).
Where you can, tackle one topic at a time. Looking for a job to get by? focus your energy on finding that job. Even if it's boring, or seems challenging, find something. Got a job and it's time to find somewhere to live? Focus on finding a place in your budget that has what you're generally looking for. If you have pets, that costs more, but you'll need to make sure you find a place that allows pets. Generally it's a good idea to make sure cost of living takes up no more than about 40-45% of what you make a month. Don't be afraid to ask someone for help if you need it! Even asking for help on here is a good start. No one really learns it all on their own.
