Did anyone else get stronger transitions when they came out?

I think I am the same. I'm a lot more comfortable and happy after accepting it. It's become a lot more easier to say what's on my mind, be honest about who I like. I'm a lot more positive.

I remember in high school I was so stressed with the possiblities of me being lesbian that I actual had health issues, noticeable changes in my body like hair loss. I never had anything serious like depression but everyday felt heavy and I didn't understand how to be happy.

Constantly forcing myself to join in on chats about guys when it was clear that I couldn't have romantic feelings for them. My faking things with my family so that I wouldn't ruin my relationship with them. The constant fear of people finding out the truth, avoiding skin ship with other girls because I felt like I would dirty them having these thoughts. I was overwhelmed with negative thoughts, always feeling ashamed.

I'm not sure how things changed but now I'm embracing what I am, I just feel healthier and no longer afraid. I'm actually looking forward to being in a relationship now. It's all thanks to me accepting it.

 

I did!

 

It wasn't until I "came out" to myself and my husband that my male side fully emerged. He's been there the whole time, influencing me. I'm considering HRT to really get to meet him.

 

Each day is a little different for me. I am bigender (AFAB). Some days the transition is subtle and it is just little things like sitting in a more masculine stance. But other days my brains wants to scream and shout it out that I am not my birth gender and am actually male that day. I feel like I notice the transitions more because I am trying to understand this whole new side of me that I didn't realize was there before.

Like what ggr said in an earlier post, when I was younger I was afraid of what others would think when I came out about my sexuality so I had to accept that first before being able to realize I was bigender. I also think that it is sometimes both about your other half being repressed and that you are now aware of your gender that make the transitions more prominent.

 

I think after coming out you can be really you and that's why you may be feeling the way you do being able to change the way you dress to suit the way you are feeling without being worried so you do you

 

Mine have actually decreased over time. I think it's because of two things: 1) I've stopped keeping a record of them and paying attention to them and 2) I'm more comfortable in myself. Both angst and panic aggravate the severity and frequency of my shifts. That's not to say I don't still get days where I feel like I've been doused in icy water, I do, but mostly the shifts are much more subtle than they were.