So i'm quite young (early teens) and my transgender experience is quite different to the ones you normally hear about. up until recently(a few months-a year) i have identified as a cisgender girl. i was happy-mostly even satisfied-with my female body, and i liked 'girly things' well enough.Now I identify as a trans guy, but i'm frequently doubting myself. i'm am a firm believer in 'gender is a social construct' so i don't reject the idea of makeup or dresses or such things, but i am scared that people like my family and future psychologists will tell me that i'm not actually trans, but that i'm just imagining it or trying to put myself into the position of a trans person. another thing that has discouraged me is that i came out to my mom and she sort of just ignored it, and although i admit my way of coming out wasn't the best-i slipped a note into her laptop overnight saying 'i'm transgender'- i had hoped that she wanted to talk about it, but she hasn't she just sort of left it alone and now im scared to even discuss transgender stuff with her and im to afraid to talk to her about it myself. she's the only one I've told. any advice? Am i maybe subconscious just faking it?
A lot of people do go through a gender phase, it's not uncommon, but I'm not saying that it is necessarily the case for you. When people go through puberty and start growing up, likes and dislikes change, feelings change, even parts of personality change. Sometimes young girls will be tomboys, then turn into girly girls, and vice versa. Gender is not a social construct, but imo certain forms of expression roles and norms are. So liking girly things doesn't make you a woman anymore than liking say, football makes you a man. Some men are very girly, but they are infact men, the reverse is also true. I would say give things time, don't be too quick to label yourself, if you're happy with your body (No dysphoria) then don't stress it, it might just be a phase or your hormones are messing with you for a while, introspecting too much or overthinking will just make you run in circles. Given time you'll eventually come to understand yourself better, life is strange and complicated at times, doubt is pretty common because it's a huge life changing, life risking shift; hormones are powerful things that can sterilize and forever change you, no need to rush it. Hope that helps.
