As a teenager and being Desi (South Asian) I have always struggled with finding other brown people like me. I feel like a lot of people assume I'm a brown girl but I'm not! I identify as non binary and I have a very androgynous style (mostly masculine passing but I still love wearing feminine stuff like my Punjabi suits during Punjabi weddings.) I just wish the South Asian community was more accepting of trans people.. I know my family won't be accepting and I'm always scared of getting beat or kicked out. Luckily I'm going to college next year so hopefully I'll be able to meet more brown people and people that are part of the LGBTQ+ community as well. It'd be cool to find more Desi people like me.
Yeah I'm a Punjabi trans guy. Suits used to be the only feminine things I liked but I can't stand them on me anymore, still appreciate them on other people though, we're part of a damn cool culture. My immediate family were very accepting luckily, they were brought up in England so had a more open minded upbringing. I'm sorry your family isnt the same. Is there any one person that might be a bit more understanding? Aunt or uncle? My dadi's birthday is next week and I have to go see about 70 of my extended family, haven't come out to them yet and getting misgendered 24/7 is not gonna be easy. You need someone to talk to then feel free to message me.
It's so nice to meet you!!! Ah I'm so excited to meet you!!! It's okay if you don't like feminine suits anymore, I'm glad you know what suits you! I'm really glad your family is accepting! Sadly all my cousins hate me and my family doesn't like me that much either, all I can think of is one cousin but I'm just scared to come out to anyone. I'll see how he is by maybe asking him general questions? Yeah I love Punjabi culture!! Punjabi food is amazing <3
Haha nice to meet you too! Yeah I mean I got forced into them as a kid, I just thought they looked cool. I was kinda jealous that the guys used to wear jeans a t-shirt whereas I had to deal with all the sparkly, jingly stuff though haha. I'd definitely recommend asking him generic questions, maybe bring up a trans person that's been in the news recently and see what his view on it is. My cousin's have said some properly transphobic things in the past, even made fun of me for wearing guys underwear etc. before I came out to them. They don't understand but I guess they try. Those that matter will eventually come round and try to be as supportive as they can. Unfortunately our culture just isn't one for LGBT people. Can't think of one person in my family that's LGBT, it's brutal towards us tbh but you might find that once one person comes out others that were too scared will follow. Who knows, you could pave the way for everyone else if you do find the right time to come out. Yeah we do have great food, got to admit, I had golgappa yesterday. Love the stuff
Ah I'm sorry about the transphobia from the past. My cousin always forced me to be feminine as a kid and it got to the point where I felt like I had to be just like her to feel beautiful. It sucked but then I realized she was so mean to me and I never want to be anything like her cause of how she treated me. Yeah sadly the LGBTQ+ community is rarely talked about in our families. I'm starting college next year so I'm excited to meet more desi people and people in the LGBTQ+ community. I know it will be a lot better than my home environment tbh. I love golgappa! My favorite is samosa chaat <3!! (I tried to do private messaging but it said I wasn't allowed. I know this must be dumb of me to ask but I'm new here so is there something I'm required to do before I can privately message other people?)
I had the same thing from my dad, forced me to be feminine. At least we learnt how to be ourselves eventually and we know what we don't want/like. Yeah it's not worth sticking around people like that, it's good you realised that she wasn't worth your unhappiness. Ahh uni is always the place to express and find yourself. That's one of the reasons I was looking forward to going, plus the socialising aspect haha, hopefully I'll still go in the next couple years it'd be a shame to miss out. You're definitely going to have a better time with more independence and time to explore yourself! Mm good taste in food! You can't private message until you become a full member, I've forgotten the things you need to become one (think it's like be here a month and have 100 posts or something) I'm sure you'll find it in the FAQ. You can still use visitor messaging though.
Hey! I'm Desi and genderfluid. (Sorry I know this is old, just thought I'd say hi). I'm also kind of sick of being alone in the Desi community. It's a little difficult when I have a tiny anxiety-attack over my gender dysphoria and there's no one around me I can talk to. Hopefully they'll deal with it when I come out lol—I totally get what everyone else is saying on this thread. I actually wanted to ask for some advice: I have prom a while from now, but everytime I think about it I get panicky because i'm fluid and I don't know how I'll work on that day (i just know for some mysterious reason that I want to wear maroon) and Idk how to make desi clothes fluid. Does anyone else have issues with this?
