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Iranian and confused!

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Miss Sara, Mar 24, 2017.

  1. Miss Sara

    Regular Member

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    Hello my name is sara
    I'm Iranian and 13 days later, I will become 18 years old.
    I have two siblings that are older than me (my oldest sister and I are 10 years apart and my other sister is 7 years older than me)
    I'm confused about my gender identify
    I don't know if I'm tomboy or an androgynous girl.
    But for sexual orientation, I must say.... I'm 50% straight and 50% asexual.( I like men, especially those who wear suits most of the time but sometimes I'm like: f#ck men, I don't need one to continue my life, all I need is my parents and siblings)
    When I was 5 years old, my parents shaved my head because I got some kind of hair disease.
    So my parents would dress me like boys because my mom thought I would look silly if I wore girly dresses with my hair being shaved.
    I have a picture where my cousin "Ati" and me are in it... I have army clothes and a veryyy big smile on my fave while my cousin wore girly clothes (she wassmiling too)
    I wore boys clothes until I was 9 years old and my hair was growing so my parentsthought " okay it's time to turn her into a girl"
    Let me tell you about my self and my habits
    My favorite colors are : blue (any kind of blue), white, gray and black ( I looove black)
    I'm crazy about video games and when I was 7 years old, I was master of video games. (My family used to play games like tekken or my father would play call of duty and they would always ask for my help because that part of the game was hard for them.)
    And I stilllove video games (if they tell me to choose between Playstation 4 and Samsung Galaxy s7, I will gladly choose ps 4 )
    I eat a lot but I would gain veryyyyyyyy little (because of that, my sisters are envious of me)
    I don't have any problem with lgbtq people (i support them) and I'm mad that my country execute them but well if any of us disagree with them, we will end up in jail (andpossibly a death sentence )
    For 6 months, I have a new taste in fashion... suddenly I like wearing male clothes again and 2 months ago I cut my hair till my shoulders ( I couldn't cut it any shorter, my family wouldn't allow me)
    And I love to be like the girl in my profile (because she looks beautiful [if they know she's a girl] and handsome [ if they assume his a boy])
    So my question is this
    Am I tomboy???
    Or an androgynous Girl???
     
  2. Yasha of XMETAS

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    First, Hello Miss Sarah welcome to EC :slight_smile:

    From what you've described you could maybe be androgynous. Though to get a better understanding which makes you happiest? When people think you're a girl? A Boy? Neither, or both? For me it's happieset when people assume I'm a man. If you feel more like a boy, girl, neither or both, which would make you happiest?

    :slight_smile:
     
  3. Miss Sara

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    Hi
    Thanks for reading it
    Well I feel happy being girl but I want people to not become mad or sad or insult me for wearing male clothes..
    The real problem is I love being girl and I love wearing male clothes. Because sometimes, I feel like I'm powerful and not some piece of jewelry for people to protect I don't want them to look down on me because I'm a girl (and honestly.... suits are very cool!)
     
  4. Aberrance

    Full Member

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    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Girls can be powerful, they're not fragile people to be protected by men! The world needs to break through that stereotype. If you want to wear boys clothes, go for it. I know a girl who rocks suits, wears shirts from the men's section and is just happy having her own style. Try finding things that you like, switch up your wardrobe a bit. I don't know what it's like living in Iran and I'm lucky to have been able to experiment with clothing living in the west so be careful and don't do anything to put yourself in any danger. Maybe buy some guys jeans or shirts to start off with, they fit differently to woman's. If you know you're a girl and you're comfortable with that (other than the gender roles and inequality) then just be yourself through your expression.
     
  5. Yasha of XMETAS

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Exactly! Gender norm stereotypes are BS, so go for it girl! If you want to dress like a guy but still be a girl that is totally ok. Being a westerner from the Great White North I am not aware of what is allowed or not in Iran. I hope you can practice your lifestyle in a safe environement. Hope it works out for you ^^
     
  6. Miss Sara

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    Location:
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    My country is a bit strange you know... we have gays and lesbians and trans too (I don't know how many but from 100, only 20 or 10 of them are. But well as long as you have money andstatus you have no problem (buying policemen or scare them when you telling them you came from this powerful family)
    It's just I'm sick of the rules in my country.
    _a man and a woman can't hold hands unless they are married to each other, if policemen see a unmarried couple, they will be arrested and they will tell their families (it's an unfortunate situation, especially if the families don't know)
    _a married man can't cheat and if they do, they will be executed.
    _a married woman can't cheat and if they do, they will be killed by stones (which people throw at them)
    But who the fuck cares.
    80% of thecountry's population are cheating, two timing, having sex while being single
    And did the rules stopped them???
    NO!
    and there is a couple of shitty rules toward women but well fuck them because everyday when I cross the street, I seewomen's clothes getting shorter and thinner.
    I see two boys and two girls who are drinking wine while laughing in a car.
    Party houses.
    And the laughing part of it...
    They insult lgbtq people, beat them, familyabandons them, executes them.
    It makes me angry as hell but what can we do. Just be silent and live
    Like a good girl should live.
    Like a good boy should live
    And have their happy heterosexual life!
    Any way, the main problem of mine is
    I'm scared, not from people's reaction but from myfamily's reaction.
    I don't want to see their angry or disappointed or sad faces
    I want to tell them
    I'm still me
    Just with male's clothes.
    I'm still straight if you're worried about that and I don't give a rat's ass if my relatives saw me as a lesbian because I'm wearing boys clothes

    ---------- Post added 25th Mar 2017 at 04:51 AM ----------

    And well I lied
    I am scared of people because sometimes they are dangerous.
    So if someday if I wear males clothes, it will be limited to my home and parties I go
    Not outside (street,
    Since people of my country are extremely heterosexual.

    ---------- Post added 25th Mar 2017 at 04:52 AM ----------

    And by the way
    Check out my album
    I posted a picture.
    The happy girl with military outfit
    It makes me laugh every time I see it :grin:
     
    #6 Miss Sara, Mar 25, 2017
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 25, 2017
  7. OtterGrump

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    I will say something that applies to everyone in a lot of situations, whether it's doing something or coming out or whatever.

    Do what it takes to be happy, unless you are putting yourself in danger to do that. It's brave to come out (or do other things, etc.), but it's also brave to not do that if you're not in a situation where you can or is not safe.
     
    #7 OtterGrump, Mar 26, 2017
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 26, 2017
  8. Miss Sara

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    I know, and believe me I won't put myself in danger(the policemen in out country is 10 times scary)
    I'm just confused
    I don't know if I'm tomboy
    Or an androgynous girl
    Or a gay trans ('cause I still like men)
    I just don't know and the only option for me (for now) is to wait a little and see which of them is me :bang: