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Looks like my transition will be delayed, again.

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Kodo, Mar 30, 2017.

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  1. Kodo

    Kodo
    Full Member

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    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    My hopes of transitioning were hinged upon moving out and attending a university this fall. After all the applications and waiting over the past six months, it looks like I will be unable to afford any of the places I applied to, the only exception being a local community college. Which means I cannot move out, and will be living with my parents for at least another year.

    It is going to be another year. Another year before I can even take the first steps. The past year I've only gotten through on the hopes that I could transition soon. I held on, month after month, breakdown after breakdown, I told myself just wait one more day. Yet the closer I come to finally getting that shot of T, the farther off that reality becomes.

    It is just very disheartening. My parents will not support me, the people I love most. They cannot see the real me. So I wait and wait. How long must I wait?
     
    #1 Kodo, Mar 30, 2017
  2. anthracite

    anthracite Guest

    You're an adult aren't you? And you could get your T. Serioulsy I think if I was you, I'd go a month on T, hit the gym hard af then go off again so you can blame the changes on your awesome discipline. If you're not at your genetic limit the muscle will most likely stay. That could help against your dysphoria.

    Also I had an idea: In germany we have some kind of financial support from various organizations. Among these, there are also offers to people belonging to a diversity group, like migrants, workers kids aaaand transdudes count too. Maybe where you're from they have something like that too? If you're comfortable with outing you could use that transgender bonus card.
     
    #2 anthracite, Mar 30, 2017
  3. Sebby45

    Sebby45
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    Location:
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    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
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    Out to everyone
    Man, I am really sorry. I know what it is like to not be understood by those you love most. And to have to go through another waiting cycle...hang in there! You know it will happen one day. Sometimes the things we want most are the things we wait the longest for. But think about how happy you will be when it happens.

    All the best,

    Sebby45
     
    #3 Sebby45, Mar 30, 2017
  4. Hawk

    Hawk
    Admin Team Full Member Away

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    Location:
    Alberta
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    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    That sucks man, but remember, "Good things come to those who wait."
    Just think about how happy you will be once you start.

    I wish you the best. (*hug*)
     
    #4 Hawk, Mar 30, 2017
  5. AnAtypicalGuy

    AnAtypicalGuy
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    Location:
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    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    I'm sorry to see that you're going through this. It's known by many of us that the process of getting started with transitioning can be a lengthy one indeed. But as tough as it sounds at the moment, know that time will pass by. You WILL move out and you WILL get that testosterone sooner than you think. In the meantime it may help to take this time to prepare yourself in order to get a headstart once you begin HRT. Hit the gym if you haven't already, keep a healthy diet etc. It may also aid your mental wellbeing to invest in a hobby. Writing and drawing really calm me down, and I find kickboxing and fencing are great stress relievers when tension builds up. Perhaps you can find something that relaxes you in a similar way.

    As I said, you'll get there before long. Until then, try and keep your spirits up as best as you can: it could help to make the time pass more quickly. Keep looking ahead.
     
    #5 AnAtypicalGuy, Mar 31, 2017
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2017
  6. PlantSoul

    PlantSoul
    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    She
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    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Check to see if you're eligible for financial aid or any grants/scholarships.
     
    #6 PlantSoul, Apr 1, 2017
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