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Name ideas?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by BostonStranger, May 18, 2017.

  1. BostonStranger

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    Okay well, it's mostly out of curiosity, but here goes. I'm genderfluid and AMAB. My avatar is a feminised photo of myself, which I use on EC because it's a safe way to express myself. Irl I look super masculine, not necessarily by choice, having the testosterone of two healthy men kinda does that to you. Anyway, my parents were so convinced that I'd be a boy, that they never even bothered to come up with a female name.

    So my question is, which name(s) come(s) up when you see my avatar?

    Don't get me wrong. I don't want to create an alter ego for myself and I don't feel dysphoric about my body (well only when I feel extra feminine, which is quite rare)
    but I think it could help me with getting more in touch with my feminine side.
     
  2. AlexJames

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    I actually google searched and looked on baby name sites myself. I want a gender neutral name but sadly the name i like i don't think actually suits me! Like you said you know how with most people you see, they just 'look' like their name? I don't think that applies with the name i like best, Alex. I came up with a variety of gender neutral names, some common some not, and liked Alex best cause just like my birth name its a common name. Saying it in my head just felt right and it was the first name to occur to me. I feel like if i picked a unique name you don't hear much it will end up being more of a 'flavor of the month' sort of name if that makes sense. that it will get changed as much as i used to change my laptop's background picture in middle and high school.

    Some of the notable ones on my list were: Alex, Brennan, Casey, Dakota, Harper, Jordan, and Quinn. I've read some great advice that my house is too crowded to have tried, though. Someone once said that they chose their name and preferred pronouns by practicing introducing themselves in the mirror at home. I think its a great idea, especially cause even during my mentally blocked, may as well have been asexual suppressed years verbalizing that i was straight to anyone who asked felt very wrong.

    I think it would be cool to know what my boy name was going to be. Apparently for a while they thought i was going to be a boy so someone made me a baby blanket that was green. Granted i think of green along the same lines as yellow and being gender neutral, but whatever. That's what my mom said.
     
    #2 AlexJames, May 18, 2017
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  3. BostonStranger

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    A gender neutral name would be cool. My name is actually gender neutral in some countries, but not in the western world. I did think about some unique names, especially names of some of my ancestors from a helluva long time ago, but like you said, it becomes a flavour of the month sort of thing.

    I've been thinking about pronouns for a few months now, and to be honest, I feel comfortable with he, she and they. Though I suppose they is more applicable. I've also heard people refer to me as "it" in the past and that pissed me off so much, because it's just plain depersonalising. Luckily that has only happened a few times.

    Pretty cool that your mum made you a gender neutral blanket. I have a somewhat similar story. When a child is born in the Netherlands, it's customary to eat beschuit met muisjes (mice) (Dutch rusk topped with aniseed in a coloured sugared coating) together with visitors. If it's a boy, the muisjes are blue and white. If it's a girl, the muisjes are pink and white. The stores are always well stocked with both variants, but my parents looked all over town and couldn't find the blue ones, so they settled for the pink ones instead. If that's not a sign, then I don't know what is :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  4. AlexJames

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    Wow thats pretty cool about the beschuit met muisjes (mice)! Lol that's definetally a sign. My baby blanket is similar, really, cause i'm the only one whose original baby blanket made by my mom was gender neutral. My brother's i believe she made of her favorite sports team, i think, and my sister's was a colorful pastel patchwork knitted quilt sort of thing. So my baby blanket being what i consider a gender neutral color (even if she said it was made with a boy in mind) i thought was pretty cool.

    Honestly i feel similar about the pronouns - at least in my head, i'm fine with she, he, and they. I haven't been able to even practice it in the mirror though, unfortunately. :icon_sad: Mom rarely leaves the house, let alone when i'm awake. I wake up fairly late when given the chance cause insomnia. I'd love to take that next step in feeling out my name/pronouns verbally.
     
    #4 AlexJames, May 18, 2017
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  5. BostonStranger

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    I hadn't even thought about trying out a name and pronouns verbally in front of a mirror. I guess it would be cool to go by two names, even if I only use a female name when I'm alone. Which brings me back to my original question. What do you think is a fitting name? :slight_smile:

    I'm gonna have the same problem though, I'm rarely alone in the house :frowning2:
     
  6. RedTrekkie95

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    Your avatar reminds me of a girl I know in college called Lucy. I personally think it's a lovely name.

    If you're looking for a gender neutral name, I think that Jamie would suit you.

    Hope this helps. :slight_smile:
     
  7. BostonStranger

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    I love Lucy, badum tss! I went to high school with a Jamie, lovely girl :slight_smile:

    I came up with the name Mabel a few weeks ago. It's fancy, but not fancy enough to not be a little crazy. But it's probably just the flavour of the month again :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  8. Chloe123

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    When I was thinking about coming up with a name I was fairly uninspiring. I chose Samantha because my birth name was Samuel (or just Sam) so people wouldn't have to make such a big adjustment when I eventually come out. But ya know, I quite like the name.
    Choose something you like. Remember your name is something you're going to have to live with for the rest of your life. Gender neutral is always good, like my name Sam or maybe Charlie. I don't know. At the end of the day it's up to you.
    Anyways, stay safe. Bye for now :slight_smile:
     
  9. BostonStranger

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    I'm not going to change my name, it's more of a personal thing, but I might share it with some close friends. With my gender being fluid, keeping everybody informed of which name I identify with at a specific time would be a full time job. I could go with Robin, which is gender neutral and technically the same name.... but I went to school with a Robin and she was kind of a b**** :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  10. Hawk

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    Cassidy?
    Casey?
    Jamie?
     
  11. BostonStranger

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    That's two for Jamie :slight_smile:
    I associate Cassidy with Butch Cassidy and Butch with masculinity. Kinda dumb, as Cassidy is a really cool name. Thanks for the suggestions :slight_smile:
     
  12. BostonStranger

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    I had a good talk with a friend of mine and she suggested thinking of women who inspire me. I thought that was a really good idea and Audrey Hepburn came to mind. She was in the resistance as a little girl and wasn't afraid to be controversial. I can totally relate to that, but I still love the name Mabel, so I figured, why not have a middle name as well? I already have one anyway :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: I looked up the meaning of both names and Audrey means Noble Strength (which fits my aristocratic roots) and Mabel means Dear/Lovable and that's just, well... endearing :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    So Audrey Mabel. What do you think? :slight_smile:
     
  13. AlexJames

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    I think it sounds great! Beautiful name. I love the name "Mabel", too, and tbh i think you look like an Audrey in your pic. Course you look like a Jamie too lol. But yes, i think you could pull off Audrey Mabel.

    Hmm makes me wonder if i should pick a new middle name myself...I picked my preferred first name, but i have yet to tell anyone cause i wanna wait till i'm financially independent (and living away from family!) and i want to be able to like and be proud of what i look like in the mirror before i tell anyone. I don't really care if i don't look like an Alex (cause i don't think i do) but it just feels right and it felt great saying it aloud in the shower this morning to just myself and my cat.
     
  14. BostonStranger

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    Thanks, I thought so too. So far it's the only name of which I thought that it fits my photo, and more importantly, me. I've made it official by telling two close friends. So now I use two names, my birth name and Audrey. It feels a little weird, but I'm sure I'll get used to it soon enough :slight_smile:

    I can't believe the progress I've made in less in less than three weeks. Three weeks ago I was merely considering looking up stories of other genderfluid people to see if there were more people like me out there and now I'm here, out to a bunch of friends and with a second name.

    Well I guess you're out to your cat now :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
    Do you think your family won't accept you if you come out?
     
  15. SemiCharmedLife

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    No idea why but the first name that popped into my head when I saw your picture was Hannah
     
  16. AlexJames

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    My mom won't even accept that i'm gay, let alone bigender. She's one of those stereotypical narcissistic mom's w/ anger issues that also happens to be a very conservative, religious christian. My dad isn't much for conversation so its hard to guage him for sure - in general, he's got a very 'if it does not affect me then i do not care' type of view on life, and he's very supportive for the most part. So there's a good chance he will accept me being gay. But me possibly being bigender i'll keep to myself.
     
  17. Nike007

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    Audrey Mabel sounds great :slight_smile: !

    When I see your profile picture though, I see Ashley. You could go by Ash when you feel more masculine, as it's a gender neutral name. I also agree with Hannah like a person before me posted.
     
  18. Jade is a gender neutral name
     
  19. kodiakruble

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    I think of name Amanda when I look at you profile picture.
     
  20. skittlz

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    Emily or Jillian. idk why