I Can't Transition

I know how you feel. Just tonight at dinner my family was bad mouthing democrats and calling anyone who would vote for Obama evil and stupid. They know I"m gay. They don't care. They just act like I never told them. Its like they just choose not to believe it or acknowledge it.

They complain about my hair being long and I say nothing. Just that I haven't had time to cut it. I'm afraid to admit that I want long hair. But I can't take it any longer.

Now I'm starting hormones without their knowledge tomorrow. I have no idea if its a good idea or bad idea, but the stress of the situation is killing me.

How old are you? Are you still dependent on your parents?

 

Cheer up!

You're lucky...

Being a guy really sucks! :roflmao:

 

We meet FtM people coming the other way, and we understand everything - except the direction they're going...

 

Hey Takashi, I'm sorry you're going through this difficult period. (*hug*)

One thing you might find helpful is to speak to your GP doctor, what you tell him should remain confidential. Tell him that you're having some trouble with your gender identity, and that it's causing you some depression. Ask if he can recommend any professionals to you.

You don't have to tell your parents anything, but going to therapy is a great first step. You have to do this to begin to transition anyway, to get the hormones. By speaking with a professional you're one step closer to getting what you need. A professional can also help you deal with your parents, and even help you speak to them if necessary.

Having a medical professional sit one of your parents down and talk to them might help, but I would recommend talking to the professional about it first, to see what they think is best.

When you go see your therapist for the first visit, make sure you question them directly about whether or not they're experienced in issues surrounding gender identity. If you have trouble speaking to your GP doctor or a therapist write a short note, fold it up, put it in your pocket, and hand it to them. That's one way to get around saying something.

I hope this helps. Please, keep us updated on how things are developing. (*hug*)

 

Sorry. I wasn't very helpful was I.

Memo to myself, it's not all about me. :icon_sad:

 

Hey, welcome to EC! I hope you know you should be proud of yourself. It is not an easy task to figure yourself out, and it takes a lot of courage to acknowledge it.

There are lots of things to do, but take it slowly in your own time. One thing at a time. Maybe you even want to get a couple of closer friends to go by male pronouns. Or maybe if you wanted to choose a name (for me it took a long time to decide on a name I felt that fit)...

On a side note. Acting is hard when you pass (sort of) and is short and has a girl voice. They don't quite know how to cast you. It ends up being young boy roles.

 

Care to explain?[/QUOTE]

I'm MtF. Talking to or reading from a FtM, I see a lot of similarities. Transpeople, regardless of gender, we share a common struggle. I've never met you, but I understand the stress of trying to stay in the closet, the fear of being outed or discovered too early, to longing to be in the right body, to be seen for who we are inside...
The only difference is, I don't understand wanting to be a boy any more than you understand wanting to be a girl.

I think what Pexetta was saying is that our journey has everything in common but the destination.

 

[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I was thinking about saying something very similar to this but I decided not to make assumptions about what Paxetta meant =P

Ultimately though, MtF's and FtM's are traveling the exact same journey. They are just traveling on different directions on the same road.

---------- Post added 3rd Sep 2012 at 10:17 PM ----------

Also, Taka, if it is mostly financial reasons preventing you from transitioning you should know that most health insurance plans cover therapy, doctor visits, and prescriptions associated with transition minus a minimal co-pay. Mine is 25 dollars for a doctor's visit and 10 dollars for a pill pickup.

 

I'm the exact opposite of you, lol. I want to be a female badly.

If we lived in Cuba, this wouldn't be a problem as the government their pays for sex changes. Makes me wish our government cared about us. Unlike here, they recognize our rights.

It's harder to transition from a FtM than it is for a MtF, so I'm sorry you're going through a tough time. It compounds the transition when you're broke and can't pay for it.

One thing I loved doing was expressing my gender identitywith my friends, so I'd stay over at their house to do it. Before coming out to my family, I did that all the time, and it was so therapeutic. Maybe that's something you can do as well, because it can be a nice outlet during the period before the transition.

 

I was just trying to make you see the humorous irony of it all, earlier with the, "Being a guy really sucks!" post. However, transitioning for a FTM transgender can be quite rewarding, if properly executed, because once you get on testosterone, your voices change, you grow body hair, and you develop more of a male oriented attitude. Also, if you workout, you'll have highly developed and much larger muscle groupings. You guys can really pull it off! There aren't many social repercussions for you guys. None that I can tell!

OTOH, for MTF transgenders, if you're over 6 feet tall, have a naturally deep voice, with large hands and feet, you're already busted!

Therefore, brighter days are ahead for you! If you can afford it, you'll be a much happier camper!

It's still kinda funny to me how something I absolutely loathe, can be so envied by another, who possesses exactly what I completely adore and vice versa....I almost wish we could trade for contentment.

 

Yes, that's a far more positive way of putting it.

 

hey, Welcome Takeshi! Yes best thing to do is to get therapy If you can, as others already mentioned. It would also ease your mind.

I'm sorry to hear that you are having hard time with your family. I hope it will gradually fade away, when they start to give it more attention. why not ask your farther, if you can see a therapist (any), if you have to depend on them to have it, it may also open his mind more to that you are having a rough time.

And about been born, yes, but we have been born already, so no use thinking of it this life I guess, Let's go for the future with what we can do with the body that we already have. and think few centuries ago,( OK, I know) there were no SRS/GRS, So people like us had to deal with more stuff than us. Isn't it better now, (of course it should get better to this, if can't be perfect). However I think it's good to see, what we already have, than not seeing it, when it comes to suffering and I hope things get easy for you.

Exactly, that's what we go through ( I think all LGBTQ people generally do so, from the start to "discovered too early" in the list, pls correct me if I'm wrong), except that I can understand that why we both genders want it. What I don't understand is, why our ladies don't understand, why we wanting to be a boy, lol. (no offense I hope. of course I only speak for me, no one else) It is exactly the same reason you want to become a girl, that we want to become the opposite, to feel same within our mind and body or in other words, have a body that match our mind.

com'n why not, we had a trading before on a thread, I had missed my chance to a bro, I guess you are reeaaally TALL right :eusa_eh:, so how about mee! ( hope you don't care about looks )...

 

Overall it seems in the end that ftm can pull off a passing result easier than mtf.
Everyday I look in the mirror loathing certain features, but I go on trying to feel better.
Problem is when I see a girl I get envious, its a vicious cycle.