So I am 19 years old and have been dealing with the thought of being trans for a long time. I have been planning on going through HRT and SRS for about 8 months now. As of recent I have been thinking that my gf of 1.5 years and I just arent meant to be. I love her. I truelly do but I do not know if being with her is what I love. I saw this article online that someone had commented on saying that sometimes transsexualism will sometimes stem from a deeper version closeted homosexuality. In laymens terms I guess that means that these thoughts that I am just an effeminite gay guy could possibly be true. So I dont really know how to go about this situation, she has supported me, loved me and helped me grow as an individual. I love her, have supported her, helped her through some really tough times this past year and yet I feel as if I stay with her I may be hiding who I am. Please give me any opinions or thoughts on this. Nothing demeaning or hurtful because I will flag them. I will also be giving out a best answer as well. Also recently I came out to my family and the world as being a transgender(so basically that leaves some play room if I decide to re-nig on my choice to be transsexual.) So Yay me there, I have come a long way.
um...you only had 9 posts here, have you experienced any demeaning hurtful responses so far? Its pretty rare, usually on religion or politics outside of trans issues here. transgender peeps can be any sexuality, gay, bi, pan, straight, asexual...any. if you love her, do you like girls? maybe yes since you like her. do you like men too? maybe, so you could be bi or pan then, right? do you wish your body to look womanly? breasts, no penis, or one but not the other? you could be a-gender, genderqueer, or other stuff i am not expert at all in, but others on here could talk abt more. im transgender. I happen to be mostly straight, but confused me as i liked a guy, actually men i get attracted to seem mildly gay...and often are. so honestly I'm prob a pretty straight guy who wants to not admit he's slightly bisexual. :/ I got a double closet, and one I'm just not wanting to open right now. again, how is dumping a girl you love and loves and supports you going to help you "find yourself"? if you found love, do you care abt the rest? me, i would stop hunting right there with a keeper!
First .. congratulations on being out to people .. hopefully reaching truth with yourself soon as well ... I will just say what I think .. I think that she is a wonderful person from what you described her to be .. and I am sure she is a jewel who will make someone extremely happy to just be alive and to her side .. but here is the thing .. are you that one ? Regardless of how you feel for her .. being with someone can have many facets .. friendship alone has many levels and yours can be an extremely deep level .. but in the end .. ask yourself .. will you be able to give her what she needs ? .. I don't mean just sexually .. I mean feelings .. love must be in 2 ways .. one gives something and the other gives back .. unless the 2 people can give and receive all types of feelings .. its going to fail .. even if one is willing to give without taking .. emotionally .. that is impossible regardless of how you feel like being able to do it .. you can give her what she wants .. but for how long ? .. and eventually you will never be able to do so on every facet as I said before ... From what I read .. you two sound like you are extremely close .. maybe you should just sit down and talk about it .. say it in all honesty (that is just a suggestion) .. and talk it out .. talk to her about how you really feel .. and find out for yourself how she will react .. you might still be together (presuming you are still identified as bisexual) and she accepts who you really are .. or your relationship may turn into a friendship that will last a life time .. of course .. there is always the chance that it could all go wrong and end up not wanting to see you (we are only humans so don't blame her if that happens and don't blame yourself as well .. you did nothing wrong and neither did she) .. that last answer only you can predict .. you should know by now the reaction she will have when she find out ... I think the best thing is to simply talk it out .. just the two of you .. based on what you said I highly doubt the last outcome is going to be the one that takes place ...
