I am bisexual, but generally lean to the males. I consider myself male, but I know that a lot of people don't, meaning mostly straight cisgender people who don't understand. I know most people classify themselves as straight or bisexual or gay, but I was wondering from a cisgender gay/bisexual point of view how open most people are to relationships with people who are trans* and how trans* people are commonly seen within the LGB community? EDIT: Or from a lesbian/bisexual female point of view too, event though that doesn't correlate as directly to me.
OK, well, I think there's no point beating around the bush here, and I'm going to be as honest as I can from my own perspective. Most of the gay people I know are open-minded about transgender people in that they acknowledge that there are similar struggles, and they can at least begin to understand the struggles that transgender people have. That doesn't mean that I haven't met gay people who are not open-minded about this topic — heck, I know one person who thinks everyone else except gay people are disgusting... lesbians, for instance. But on the whole, people who have any notion of the concept of the LGBT community understand that we are all "in this together", for lack of a better term. But on the other hand, I do not know anyone who is attracted to people who are transgender. It's not that they are not "open" to being in a relationship with someone who is trans, but more in the same way that I am not really all that attracted to women. Even though I've discussed this topic quite recently with my group of friends, it's just that: my group. I might be shot down for this, but I think it would be accurate to say that the dating opportunities for transgender people are much more limited than even for other groups within the LGBT spectrum. I think it will definitely take time to find someone.
Personally, I am open to relationships with people who are trans*, but no, I do not believe, unfortunately, that gay folks are open-minded, having been on the wrong end of their closed-mindedness with respect to both bisexuality and my gender presentation.
I would be open to the relationship. But, I don't think most others would be. :/ — is that Ciel? :eek:
Like two posters above me, I am definitely open to a relationship with any gender (and/or sexual) minority. But there are a lot of divisions within the community... don't lose hope though. I bet there are many more like me and the other posters.
Statistically, I don't know. But I know of some gay / bisexual folks who don't really like or approve transgender relationships. Some of those think that way to defend themselves, to avoid being seen as females or feminines, so their efforts to stop the heteronormative stereotyping don't fall out.
It depends on the person honestly. I've had an argument with someone on here who was a gay male. He was intent in his beliefs that no matter how you presented yourself that "born with penis = male, vagina = female". Through various experiences I have sadly learned that he is not the only person in the GLB community who thinks this way. In all honesty, I can see no difference between GLB and straight people in their thinking of us on certain issues like dating. Will it always be like this? It all depends on the level of education and how open-minded they are. However, I don't assume anymore that just because someone is GLB that they are on my side and would freely see me as an equal. It's a sad truth, but a truth none-the-less.
Ok, I am trans M to F and am 40yo. To date I have NEVER been with a gay male. They never seem to want me. I have been with 2 BI guys and found with both they still needed to cheat with both sexes. All other men I have been with have been straight. In my case most men seem to see me as female on some level. I have talked about my experiences on other posts. EC has made me realize straight men don't treat gay guys like they do me. I have always thought straight meant straight to bed and all straight men asked for BJs from gays. You know the old stereotype gays can suck it better due to they have one. I have often thought I have a blinking billboard above my head that says "Sucks Dick Well". I will add till this Jan I thought I was gay due to it was what I was told and I could not understand why the gay world would not accept me but the straight one does. Because 9 out of 10 straight guys I befriend or am around for a short time will at least ask for a BJ rather quickly. In my case my theory is it has to do with a scent I put off combined with my soft white skin, soft long hair, fem bone structure of my face, and my kind female spirit all radiate female to guys. Being a woman, I understand other wemen and am mistified and baffled by men. My husband who is a straight redneck country boy has a exwife of 10 years with 3 kids and 4 other major GFs says no matter how I look I am 100% woman in his eyes and the best one he has ever found. He truely loves me and we are about the most unlikely couple. So for me guys who identify as straight 9 out of 10 I am around are open minded to some extent, and gay men seem to be completely closed minded 100% so far. I have only met a hand full of BI guys and they don't seem to open either. I can always pick the gay ones, because they are either stairing me down with daggers in their eyes, or wont give me the time of day and are repelled by me. I really don't understand this at all, but it is what happens. June
Myself, personally? I am a panromantic, and therefore gender doesn't matter in romantic relationships. Everyone else? They aren't the same as I am. A lot of gays can be transphobic , so I'd be careful with who you try to go out with. I know a girl who is bisexual and says she would NEVER date a MtF or even a FtM! So no, sadly not all gays are open minded. But it won't be hard to find one who is.
This man. This says it best. Personally, it doesn't bother me one bit and I have always had a desire to know someone who is trans on a more intimate level. Sometimes GLB can be so boring....And close-minded as well. :smilewave
On general views within the LGB community, just going by what I've read about on here, they seem extremely disappointing to say the least. Which has been surprising to me as I've seen a fair number of trans* individuals in the LGBT group I attend and, to my knowledge, it's just as welcoming an environment for them as anyone else. As far as openness to a relationship I can only speak for myself and it's something I've thought about from time-to-time, perhaps more so recently, and I'd say I'm open to dating a trans* man. I would only be apprehensive due to the possibility of not being sexually compatible, but that alone wouldn't cause me to rule out dating one so long as I genuinely felt attracted to him.
