Yesterday, I was having fun with my girlfriend, and I could only think of male genitalia during oral. It got me off in a heartbeat. Since then, I got off to men about 3 times yesterday and once this morning. All I can think about is men. And it gets me off strong. Yesterday, I realized that I was bored with female genitalia and wanted male genitalia. But I don't think I'm really much more turned on in a guy's body than that. Kissing a guy is weird, always has been (I've tried), and touching his body is also weird. Just the genitalia. But it has been turning me on more than female genitalia and getting me off really fast, ever since I gave myself the leeway to fantasize about it. On the other hand, I fantasized later this morning about a woman, and while it wasn't as kinky, it felt so right. I love touching a woman's body, or even the thought of it. It's really amazing and I feel like a million bucks. I just think my sexual mind wants a guy's stuff or even a guy, though it physically grosses me out. Am I really gay? Or bi with gay leanings? Or can I actually be bi with straight leanings? I just wish I was more attracted to pussy, because I used to be very much when I was younger and it means much more to me, but as of now, I can't possibly believe I'm straight, and that I really may be gay since pussy isn't turning me on. I want to cry, because it used to mean the world to me and now it doesn't anymore, it's like I'm dying a little inside.
Ah yes, the binary male/female problem that society has set up. Luckily for you there is hope: the Transgender community. We have some girls that are physically fully female and are perfectly fine having a penis. Sadly a lot of our girls struggle finding boyfriends who aren't "creeped out" by what's between their legs. You'd have to make sure that they're perfectly comfortable having one and have no plans on getting it removed though. It all depends on our level of Gender Dysphoria and what our ultimate goals are in transitioning. In my GLBT group I know of a bisexual guy who is with a straight Transgender M2F that's keeping her downstairs parts. He's happy because he has "the best of both worlds" in his girlfriend, and she's happy to have someone who treats her like a woman and not some "one night fantasy sex" experiment. It's perfectly natural for a straight/bi person to be attracted to certain aspects of both genders being physically on someone. A person who wants a woman/man with the opposite downstairs parts are called Transsensuals. Though there are those out there who wish to just experiment once to see what it'd be like. We call those people "chasers" and avoid them at all costs, as they see us as nothing more than just sex objects. If you're serious and can show that you really are a Transsensual and not just another guy looking to experiment you'll find a very loving woman who can fulfill what a "naturally born" woman can't offer. If you're interested in knowing more I'll be happy to help with more information. ^_^
I wanted to mention that I really have no interest for the guy. That I believe it's a cock fetish I developed when I was 16. Before then, everything about a woman was perfect. I don't understand it. Even to this day, I don't really like the idea of kissing a guy or touching a guy. Just his cock and the kinkiness of it. But physically, not my thing. Women are perfect, but I'm fetishizing cock more than my love for pussy and it's turning me on, but romantically it doesn't feel right. When I fantasize about cock, I end quicker, but when I fantasize about women, it feels great - I feel like a million bucks. So I don't get this. Fortunately, I'm seeing my therapist today, but I think I've already crossed the line into gay and I can't come back. I'm really disappointed now. Sorry. I just never saw myself as gay before.
Well, you just answered yourself that you're not gay. Outside of a penis nothing else turns you on about a guy. And not all women have vaginas hun. So why limit yourself to only being partly happy by sticking to ridiculous gender stereotypes? You can be with a woman who has a cock and get the best of both worlds. Transgender porn is insanely popular with straight and bi people. Give it a try, you might be surprised by what you find.
Do you wish a cock was part of a woman? In reality it's just a body part. If the thought of it being attached to a guy grosses you out, then I would say you're pretty much straight. I'm not into women but it wouldn't bother me if a FtM had a vagina. Doesn't make me straight or bi. It's attached to a man. You might like the idea of your gf wearing a strap-on or perhaps a MtF with a cock. If there is nothing else on the male body you like then I can't see you enjoying the entire experience. It probably be better on a female body for you.
Haha really? I have found the opposite. Most trans girls want nothing to do with guys who are interested in their other parts (regardless of how charming or serious you are about a relationship). If you show any attraction to a girl because she is trans you are automatically labelled "chaser" and thought of as scum.
Most trans girls are afraid of just being sex objects. How do you present yourself to them? Do you say anything to them about them being attractive because they are Trans*? Has any of your questions seemed to turn the girl off? One of the common mistakes that people make is in how they talk to us. Don't make yourself appear that you are attracted to them because they are Trans*. Make the girl feel like the real woman that they are. People who come across as anxious to be with a Trans* girl sends red flags that they might be a chaser. Dating a Transgender sadly has a lot of entry barriers.
Ok, so I was exaggerating a decent amount with my post. I haven't actually pursued a transgender person to my knowledge before. But my friends who are trans basically tell me that I am a chaser if I pursue someone when I know they are trans ahead of time. Or they just call any attraction I have in that direction a fetish, that can't lead to a lasting relationship. Maybe I am just stubborn and don't see what they see, but at the very least I would never want to hurt anyone or "use" anyone, so I don't see what is so wrong about pursuing someone I find attractive (and you know attractive means all the things that go into attractiveness, not just what your body looks like). As to your other points, I understand them and wouldn't present myself that way. Honestly I am kind of afraid of getting my head bitten off, so right now... I am only looking for friends .
I once had a friend tell me pretty much what you have said above. I first asked him what about 'kissing a guy' felt weird to him, and if it was only the feeling of it being weird. - He currently labels himself bisexual. I think quite a lot of people go through a 'feels a bit weird' phase when first associating with the same-sex. I myself remember going through this myself when I was around fourteen. Even though I'm exclusively homosexual. The phase of this my have been some kind of subconscious denial on my side, but it soon faded away. I wouldn't say there is a define line of being gay, or straight. Most people will agree it's more of a grey gradient rather then black and white; but I think it's even more complicated then that myself. Considering personal preferences with each gender you may have, etc. Just go with the flow...
