So I've been trying to find a label that fits me for like 6 months or more, but without avail. I did at first consider myself just plain female to male trans, but I've slowly realised that that doesn't explain it enough. Like I definitely do not feel like a girl, but I'm not 100% guy either. I feel like 75% male and 25% agender. I don't even think that has a label, but I want one so I can actually give someone a straight answer when they ask me what my gender is, as well as pronouns that work for me. I'm considering like "xe" or "ze" instead of he or her, but I get the impression that people just think I'm pretentious when I say that, like they think I'm being different just for the sake of it, which isn't true.
hmmm... female to male trans questioning... alot of my friends keep their opposite self for the sake of sanity.... a few of them especially m-f's tend to hold onto their masculine side for self protection... Strangely enough alot of us have no true label... I mean try to come up with a label is fun at times but... it can hurt too... myself I have been listed as M2Fw/(ma/fb)w/(agp) so I live my confusion too male to female with male asexuality/and female bisexualism/ with an autogynaphilia fetish.... very confusing lol I just look at myself as a Male 2 Female who wants so bad to be a girl that when i am treated like a guy I can't preform... when treated like a girl I can't stop lol or... I am a Bisexual-Lesbian Trapped in a Mans Body(All the Queens Men) great movie
I have no experience with this, but I saw this episode of the Tyra Show and there was a woman who I find really inspiring. She was born with both parts and actually identified as a male for part of her life but then decided to just go with whatever. She said being referred to as ze is confusing for people but kind of fit her the best. Here's the link if you want to watch it: November 16th, 2009 PART 1 - YouTube
I feel similarly. I am not, by any means, a woman in the sense of the word that most people use...though I am FAAB and use female pronouns--for the sake of ease. But I don't think I'm FtM either. That's why I use the label queer for both my gender and sexuality right now. It doesn't make sense to me to pick a gender and there isn't a label that I feel like works for me otherwise, so just all around queer is the one that feels the most right. And if I figure out another I like better I'll use that. But uness/until that happens, I'm sticking to queer.
have you considered the term "genderqueer"....? google it and you will find an endless amount of information and a large community surrounding the term.
My view is that labels are for other people, so you don't have to explain everything about you every time. They don't have to be 100% accurate because it's impossible for any label to be 100% accurate. Because labels just describe a single aspect of you, your orientation and identity, and even then it's multiple choice instead of essay. Like one of the things I'm attracted to in a woman is someone that's geeky and fun and wants the same things out of life that I want. There's no way a word is gonna take that into account and it's a real part of my orientation. I don't want a woman that's cool with the fact that I'm trans and views me as a female, if that woman wants to spend all day watching RomComs and wouldn't go to a concert with me. I've got to be able to fall asleep drinking margaritas while watching dumb horror movies with a girl, you know? I mean I don't want a me clone and you've gotta keep an open mind and let people surprise you, but there's some things you just know you need, and gender and orientation are just such a small slice of that.
